G.I. Joe has macho fun without trying too hard
As disjointed and frenetic as a Saturday morning cartoon from Japan, GI Joe: Retaliation could very well bring out your inner child, in addition to your inner child’s attention deficit disorder.
A 3D adrenalin rush cast from the three-and-three-quarter inch moulds of the mid-80s variety of action figures, GI Joe: Retaliation relies on a convoluted thread of narrative featuring Snake Eyes, Storm Shadow, Duke and Roadblock — to name but a few.
Some of these characters are good. Some are bad. And some, well, it’s hard to keep track because there are a lot of silicon masks, and some characters switch sides halfway through this dizzying, star-studded silliness.
To be honest, I’m not quite sure exactly what happens — or why — in this movie, but then again, I could never follow an entire episode of Transformers, either.
These latter-day brand-heavy entertainments have no urgent desire to tell a timeless story. They don’t even want to make you think. From the moment the Hasbro logo shimmers onto the screen in three metallic dimensions, G.I. Joe’s sole mission is to keep you entertained using any means.
The first device is visual. Carefully weaving the benefits of computer-generated effects with live-action stunt work, this second G.I. Joe movie finds a highly seductive balance between heartpumping humanity and what’s dazzlingly unreal.
One entire sequence takes place on the side of a massive mountain as good ninjas and bad ninjas dance across a cliff face, while another features the wholesale destruction of a heavily populated European city.
Granted, we’ve seen most of this before, but director John M. Chu brings a novel edge to the proceedings by bringing just the right tone.
Unlike Michael Bay, who strapped his heart and soul to the oversized rocket of Transformers, Chu realizes he’s making a Saturday morning matinee and keeps the epic hardware in his jumpsuit.
Even with the massive frame of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson standing tall against a big-budget production design, the movie feels more human than most of these plasticized, product-driven outings.
This emotional accessibility, facile as it is, is the central reason G.I. Joe: Retaliation has any modicum of charm, and it’s thanks to the chemistry between Channing Tatum and The Rock, as well as the inimitable smirk of Bruce Willis.
The real meat of this movie is the buddy stuff between Willis, Johnson and Tatum — three men who are so comfortable in their manhood, they have anything to prove.
Tatum and Johnson get a chance to play out the rituals of male bonding in the trenches, while Willis carries the flag for the aging warriors sent out to pasture before their time.