COLLEEN BARAN

DIIIIIIIIID IIIIITTTT HAPPEN

The stage is cluttered with family members and smiles. You fill out index cards. Press buttons. Feel buoyed by laughter and attention. A question goes up on the board. You’re in it to win it. You’re not here to make friends. “What is—the reason she says she drinks.” (Yay, points!) “What is—reasons to lock your bedroom door.” (Points!) (Points!) (Points!) Mom says, “I’ll take—pretend it never happened—for 500.” She sweeps the board. (Applause! Cries!) It doesn’t matter. You’re pretty sure you’re ahead. You’re in the bonus round. You take turns. One person tells a secret, the others press either a true or a false button. The audience will shout the results from flashing lights you can’t see. Just above your heads, lit by the red glow, you can feel the verdict coming.