Investments will help children in the future

Dear Annie: Many people say they feel obligated to buy birthday and holiday gifts for children they rarely see or who are already overindulged. I had that situation with my brother’s family.

My sister-in-law goes overboard in the gift-giving department. So my thought was: Why buy another toy that will get lost in the pile? And since I don’t see them that often, what do I buy?

The solution was to put the money I would have spent into a certificate of deposit, a TAP (college tuition) account or a share of stock.

Each time, I send a card letting them know how much has been invested in their name.

My sister-in-law hates this. She’s all about the gift-opening experience. My brother, however, loves it.

He’s tired of shovelling a trail through his house.

The kids don’t care, but when they are older, they sure will appreciate that deposit for a new car or having part of their college tuition paid or knowing there’s an investment nest egg started for them.

The Aunt They’ll Appreciate Later

Dear Aunt: We’re on your side — and we suspect these kids will be, too, albeit not for a while.

Good for you for not allowing yourself to be pressured into spending on stuff they will forget about in a month. Dear Annie: I liked your reply to Lost Soldier, who had trouble reconnecting to the civilian world after serving in the military. As an ex-navy Seabee, I understand completely.

What helped me the most was joining some of the local service-connected groups like the American Legion, AMVETS, FRA and, for me particularly, the Seabee Veterans of America.

It was nice to be able to talk to others without having to “translate” and to again have the feeling of being part of a family.

He could also volunteer with one of the groups.

Or, if there is a nearby military display or museum, try there. I never served aboard a ship, but I now help take care of a Second World War museum ship.

Any ex-military person is and always will be part of the larger Army/navy/marine/air Force/ Coast Guard family.

Can Do

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column.