There, there, I understand
Once upon a time there was a handsome prince with a brilliant smile and great hair. He lived in a big house, high on a hill and had everything a boy could want except lots of friends. More than anything, he wanted everyone to like him and see what a fine fellow he was.
One day, while doing his homework he came upon a new word, “empathy.” Apparently, showing empathy to others was a sure way to indicate that you cared for them and understood their problems at the deepest level, even if you didn’t really have a clue. He immediately decided that if being empathetic didn’t win him friends, nothing else would.
From that point on, each time a schoolmate would share a problem or worry that was causing him or her concern, the prince would smile and gently say, “There, there, I understand.” Even if he really thought the person was just a whiner or complainer, it was always, “There, there, I understand.”
At first, his new ‘empathy’ was a complete success. Wherever he went and whomever he met, people loved him. All he had to do was flash his mega-watt grin, toss his raven locks and repeat his mantra, “There, there, I understand.” People lined up to shake his hand and to take ‘selfies.’ They hung on every word and fully believed he was the best prince ever. Then it happened.
Another boy, in the same class, whose smile was not so bright, with hair too short to blow in the wind, and who was not nearly as popular, started calling the prince a “phony” and a “charlatan.” He had a dictionary too.
“Sure, he always says ‘There, there I understand’ but what does he ever do about your problem? Tell me your concerns and I’ll come up with a solution or at last a plan of action. If you have a problem isn’t it better to deal with it and not rely on a whole lot of crocodile tears?”
What was even worse, this new boy began calling the prince names behind his back: Doctor Do-little, Superficial Fred, Captain Care-less and several others that were even ruder. It had to stop.
The first thing the prince decided to try was to form a committee of other students each time a new problem came up. This would surely be seen as concrete action and silence the growing number of critics. Unfortunately, this also meant that the prince would have to work with others, a task he was not, according to his previous report cards, very good at.
Just the same, the prince was surprised at how stupid some of the other students were. He listened to their opinions, of course, and often said, “Three, there, I understand,” but invariably added, “This is what I’ve decided we will do.”
Meanwhile, the other boy saw how many people were beginning to join his side and decided to redouble his efforts to become the most popular kid in class. No matter what the prince said, even if it was possibly correct, the other boy yelled “wrong!” Of course, he also offered solutions as well; most of them just because they were the opposite of what the prince suggested.
Finally, the prince, in desperation, decided the only way to remain the most popular kid in class was to do what his father had done years before: give them toys! To this end the prince maxed out his Visa card and when he said, “There, there, I understand,” added, “Here’s a little something to make the pain go away,”
Unfortunately, we won’t know if the prince or the new kid lived happily ever after until sometime between now and October 2025; when the rest of the class gets a chance to choose.