From teasing to close friendship, siblings share lasting bond
National Siblings Day was celebrated recently.
Coincidentally, just a short while ago, I was perusing old photo albums at Mom and Dad's. I have looked at those albums on countless occasions and I still die laughing when I open them - so many random and hilarious pictures of my siblings and me that hold so many funny memories. Birthdays, weddings, graduations, proms, sporting events, 4-H, anniversaries, vacations, and random everyday life bits.
Photos are much more curated nowadays. The ability to have multiple takes without wasting film makes for more edited versions of reality. I would say at least 50 per cent of the photos in our albums are majorly short of perfection. Cheese! And the rest was history.
In one of the photo albums, there is a snap of me celebrating my provincial win for my 4-H speech called My Three Brothers. I recited that speech so many times I can still remember bits of it, though most of it was about being teased and tormented.
I am the youngest and only girl in my family; I have three older brothers. Over the years, when I have divulged my placement in the family tree, people often replied with, "Oh, the only girl and the youngest – you must have been a princess. Three older brothers to look out for you!"
Au contraire.
SIBLING SQUABBLES
I did have a few key benefits. For one, I got my own room - all three of the boys shared until we added a piece onto the house - and my clothes were not handme-downs. But most of my childhood consisted of me trying to participate in anything my brothers were doing and, 99 per cent of the time, getting denied.
I have a vivid memory of a day I begged the boys to play hide-and-goseek with me. To my great disbelief, they obliged. They told me they would give me extra time to hide and find a stellar hiding spot. I took off running and climbed a tree in the backyard.
As I sat there amongst the leaves, I could hear my oldest brother say, "Come out, come out, wherever you are."
Time passed. I was so impressed with myself. After what felt like an eternity, I climbed down the tree and took off running to home base. It was then that I realized my brothers had left and gone to town.
My mom was a nurse, and for much of our childhood, she worked shiftwork. One Friday evening, Mom was getting off work and my two oldest brothers were picking her up before getting dropped at a friend's house.
I asked them if I could go to town with them. They said no, for no reason other than they had the power to do that because they were older than me. I asked Dad if I could hide in the back of the van and he said yes. So, while they were covering themselves with cologne, I climbed in the back and waited for them to jump in the van.
My dad sharpened knives and blades as a hobby. That night, he asked the boys, while on their way to pick up Mom, to drop off some freshly-sharpened knives at Wong's restaurant. My brother, who was in the passenger seat, had the knives on his lap. As they drove to town, they yacked about lots of things they did not want their 12-year-old sister to hear.
About three-quarters of the way there, I made the fatal error of sitting up and saying "Boo!"
Chris slammed on the breaks and they both screamed things I cannot include in this article. Steve said he could have stabbed himself with the knives on his lap.
They pulled the van over and said, "Get out!' I refused. Again, they said "Get out." I did, and they drove away. I thought maybe they would go ahead to the next driveway - no. The lights got further away and disappeared around a bend.
As I stood there on the side of the road, I thought, "What am I going to do?" Thankfully, before I had to take action, the van came back up the road. "That will teach you a lesson to not do that again," they said.
DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES
I remember reading a piece by a favourite author of mine that said life isn't about what happens to you, it's about how you perceive and react to what happens to you. She told the story of her three first cousins all recanting the same story about their mother from each of their unique perspectives - three completely different stories.
I am sure some of my stories have different spins when told from the standpoint of my brothers. Well, my ninja memory allows me to remember life moments that others blank on. These memories give me stories to tell, and let's just say helped build my character.
As we grew up, the teasing and mental games ceased. In fact, I remember one of my brothers telling me on the day of my prom that I looked classier than any other girl. Say what?
When one of the boys was getting married, he said something to the effect of, "I've been doing a lot of reflecting and I really feel the need to apologize to you for all of the mental torture over the years. I have no idea how you have so much selfconfidence."
Fast forward to today, my brothers are my great friends. They all have children now, and in a twist of fate, seven of the eight kids are girls and only one boy in the mix.
The tables have turned, and my brothers are now outnumbered by female energy.