Reason for wanting to see ex just creepy
DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I just ran into an old girlfriend of mine. Wow! She looked younger than when I dated her 10 years ago. I complimented her on how young and beautiful she looked, and she gave me the indulgent smile you’d give a green kid. On the drive home, I figured it out. She must have had a bunch of work done, like a tummy tuck, Botox and/or a facelift. I heard you can even get your thighs and underarms done. Yech. Anyway, I found her on Facebook and we’ve been talking. I feel like asking her out. Should I? I’m a little freaked out by what I would see if she got undressed. Actually, I’m really curious. — Dying To See, South End
Dear Dying To See: Do this woman a favour, and stay far away from her. You’re annoyed because she thought you were naive. It sounds like you want to see if she has railroad tracks all over her body. That would be a creepy reason for wanting to reconnect. By the way, that’s not what modern plastic surgery scars would look like; they are minimal and often hidden. She may also have gone the gym route and resigned her body naturally with weightlifting and full-body workouts. Whatever she’s done is none of your business. She needs someone who is on the same wavelength and respects her.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m 16, have a big build and eat a lot. I was really hungry after a hockey game and met my new girlfriend for something to eat. She looked disgusted when I ordered three hamburgers, large fries and a milkshake and wolfed everything down. She sat and drank a black coffee — zero calories. Afterward, she wiped the goop off the front of my shirt and asked for a ride home right away. She usually texts me right after we say goodbye, but the last two days, there has been nothing. I haven’t texted her, either. I know she was disgusted by my piggy behaviour, but then she has weight issues of her own — she makes herself throw up — so maybe she was feeling sick looking at me. My mom says I should tell someone if I’ve broken up with them, but it feels like she broke up with me. What should I do? — Hungry Bear, Brandon
Dear Hungry Bear: This is a mismatched relationship, and it sounds like both of you have backed off. You might text her and say, “I haven’t heard from you, so I’m guessing that means we’re not seeing each other anymore?” Then all she has to do is text you back with a “Yes, you guessed it.” At least you have acknowledged it from your side. Nothing feels lousier than not knowing if you’ve broken up or not, and she’s a girl with emotional issues to start with, so be kind.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m on my third husband and it looks like this one’s headed for the ditch, too. I feel like a snake that needs to shed its skin. I love any guy until he’s living under my roof. Like the others, this one never goes anywhere himself and suddenly doesn’t seem to have any friends around, or any interests except for me. I don’t like any guy tagging after me everywhere I go. We’ve been married eight months, and I’ll bet he’s only gone out twice on his own. Granted, I’m a great cook and lover, but I still like to go to movies, concerts, bingo and such. I feel like I have a leech stuck to my butt. I hate to break up a third marriage, but I’m going crazy! I still love this man, but I can’t stand him around me all the time. — Constant Cook and Lover, North End
Dear Constant Cook: Your husbands move in and start playing the role of the old-fashioned good husband. They don’t quite “get” you when you start complaining. You sound creative and energetic to me, so show hubby No. 3 the shape of the life you want to have with a mate, instead of complaining about his presence at home.
Start by meeting him outside the house twice a week for activities that include other people. Invite his old friends and their wives and girlfriends to join you for dinners, drinks, bowling, concerts and parties. One night a month you could even clear out so he could have his friends over for poker, without you there. Get the picture? You love this guy, so demonstrate a fun way you want to live. Please send your questions and comments to love[email protected] hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free
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