Guru, I need to know: what’s your ab routine?
A Guru falls squarely into the ‘one big ab’ camp, reader, with his distinctive midsection developed through a steady combination of jaw exercises and a dedication to diet. Consulting with svelter chums on Team T3, though, reveals to GaGu that hardening one’s gut into several lovely lumps is really a case of putting in the hard work and dealing with subcutaneous fat.
There’s no one weird trick, despite what every other internet advert would have you believe. Do not drink cider vinegar at night, or balance a carrot on end while closing one eye and reciting some awful mantra to the dark lord. Don’t even rely on the services of an ab belt like the £140 Slendertone Evolve, because while that might do a good job of sending your gut wall into spasm, it’s not exactly going to lase away the goo.
If you’re determined to fill your home gym with six-pack sculpting ephemera that doesn’t break the bank, you could get yourself a Perfect Fitness Ab Carver Pro (£53) to add a bit of variety to your routine as you pretend to be a stretchy Robin Reliant. An exercise ball can also be used to good effect – Guru won’t recommend a ‘best’ one, because they’re all on a fairly similar level – and there are various stupid sliding and crunching devices that GaGu will not recommend because he’s cross at the amount of never-used fitness gear currently languishing at the back of his shed.
The real key is to work hard. Do your sit-ups, your crunches, your burpees. Grab some weight – maybe some dumbbells, maybe Olympic plates, maybe a small child, and clutch them to your chest while you crunch. Find a wellbraced bar that can hold your weight and push out core exercises like leg raises; use a bench or a sofa to raise your legs and plank like heck.