Raise gentle questions about grandchild
Bridge
Q – I’m concerned about my daughter’s eight-month-old baby.
Several family members have also asked me if he’s okay.
He doesn’t make eye contact and is always looking up and his eyes are crossed.
He doesn’t hold his head up well and physically doesn’t do much.
He doesn’t attempt crawl, grasp objects, etc.
I’ve gently suggested to my daughter to get his eyes checked and that he might have something wrong with his neck.
Our family doctor saw him and said there was no need for him to be seen by a paediatrician.
This doctor is for not sending specialists when asks.
He only gave him a needle and said that the baby has full range of motion in his neck.
The baby has either been sleeping or crying when the doctor has seen him.
How do I get my daughter to see what everyone else sees and push for him to get seen by a proper doctor?
If I say anything more she’ll stop talking to me and will end contact.
I don’t want to lose either one of them. I don’t want to ignore this either.
There may be something severely medically wrong.
I love him no matter what, but if he can be helped, he needs early to sit, well known patients to the patient detection.
Severe Autism concern.
Struggling Grandma is definitely a
A - A grandmother’s life experience and wisdom can help a young mother be proactive in seeking medical information for her child’s wellbeing.
Or, it can be dismissed as part of ongoing serious mother-daughter stress and divides.
An Internet search about crossed eyes in babies will reveal that it’s not uncommon and still normal in many cases, for babies’ eyes to be crossed in the early months of life and to straighten out by the end of the first year.
Still, you’re correct that it’s worth noting and getting more informed.
If the eyes don’t straighten out, the condition causing it can and should be treated.
If the family doctor remains resistant after a year, a specialist should be referred to and seen. Or the mother can take the baby directly to a hospital clinic for that examination.
Meanwhile, make sure your heightened concern and suspicion about “severe autism” is more about the baby than your uneasy relationship with your daughter.
FEEDBACK: Regarding seeking help for child/teen bed-wetters (June 27):
Reader – “My son began wetting his bed at age seven.
It became part of our home life. We were tolerating it for about a year when I caught an episode of 60 Minutes and the question, “Does Your Child Snore?” appeared.
“So much information came out of that episode and we were able to make a connection between the snoring, the bed-wetting, and a dental exam when four root canals were required.
“The cause was sleep apnea due to his oversized tonsils being relaxed, blocking his airway, and preventing saliva from passing during his rest.
“It turned out that his bed wetting was actually saving his life. it was his body’s way of waking him up to breathe.
“Our doctor scheduled him for surgery almost immediately and he never wet the bed again.
“That procedure completely transformed my son’s life.”
TIP OF THE DAY
Don’t let mother-daughter tensions put a baby’s wellbeing in the middle. Raise gentle questions, not escalated fears.
By Jacqueline Bigar