Sarah Polley addresses Mac grads
Filmmaker awarded honorary doctorate
It’s somewhat difficult to imagine Sarah Polley suffering from stage fright.
After all, the iconic Canadian director, actress, writer, and activist has spent her entire career in the spotlight, from her days playing Sara Stanley on “Road to Avonlea” to her more recent award-winning stints behind the camera.
But Polley, 38, shared the story of her “terrible, debilitating stage fright” — as well as her advice to “confront the things that scare you” — to McMaster graduates Tuesday while accepting her honorary doctorate of letters.
Polley, who did not attend university, is a self-professed lover of both Hamilton and McMaster.
“If I could do it all over again and have a university education, or if I ever decide to pursue one in the future, this is where I would want to be,” she said. “I love the kind of thinking this place fosters. I love how nonlinear it is, I love the curiosity and intense love of learning I come across when I talk to people who have been through this institution.”
Polley, whose husband is a graduate of McMaster’s Arts and Science program, was awarded the honorary doctorate to mark her contribution to Canadian film. Her prolific career includes her work as an actress in works such as “The Sweet Hereafter,” “The Weight of Water,” “My Life Without Me,” and “Dawn of the Dead.”
She is the award-winning director of two films, “Away from Her” and “Take This Waltz,” as well as the documentary “The Stories We Tell.” She is currently the writer/producer of the CBC/ Netflix adaptation of Margaret Atwood’s “Alias Grace,” due for release in August.
Polley spent much of her convocation address telling a personal story about her struggle with being onstage.
Polley told the crowd of graduates, families, and academics about how her stage fright dates back to when she was 15, playing the lead role in “Alice Through the Looking Glass” at Stratford. Throughout the course of that performance, Polley said she developed a vocal tick that caused her to over-enunciate the last syllable of many words.
While she corrected the tick within the course of a few performances, an overwhelming sense of anxiety and fear soon took over.
“Every moment after that was terror. I would count down the minutes to 7:30 every night when I would walk onto that stage, certain that I would fail,” she said.
Polley, who had developed scoliosis as a child and was told she would eventually need surgery, saw only one way out: she visited a surgeon in Toronto and asked him to book an operation as soon as possible. To this day, she said, she still has nightmares about the experience and has told very few people the truth about why she dropped out of that show.
Polley told the crowd that decision to accept her honorary degree from Mac and deliver the convocation address gave her an opportunity to confront her stage fright.
“Despite my terror, I wanted very much to be here today, more than I wanted to listen to my fear. It is exhilarating to walk right into the middle of a fear and stand here in the centre of it, because you know that it’s worth it to you,” she said. “I spent a long time thinking I needed to conquer my fear before I ever needed to be on the stage again — but actually, it’s not a prerequisite for doing what you want to do.”
“Action and fear can coexist, if you let them.”