Gifts that aren’t stuff can lead to surprises, adventure
Turns out, there are better presents to give your wife than a pair of socks.
Every Christmas for the last 20 years or so, I have given my wife a set of feet warmers as a gift. Like a number of traditions in our family, it started as a lark and has now taken on a life of its own, to the point where I would likely be in trouble if I didn’t make it happen.
Don’t get me wrong, these are not run-of-the-mill, boring old socks but usually premium, I’d-never-buy-these-for-myself type socks. The labels often feature words like “Merino wool,” and “cashmere,” and “you are a fool for paying this much for these.”
That said, they are still just socks. And while there are often other presents involved — we often get something for the house called a “we gift” — it’s often a struggle to come up with ideas, especially when we are actively trying to have less stuff instead of more.
Last Christmas, I surprised my wife by buying her concert tickets instead of a gift. She loves the comedian Trevor Noah and while he wasn’t coming to Canada on this particular tour, he was playing in Schenectady, N.Y. We’d never been to Schenectady and this seemed like as good a reason — perhaps the only reason — to make the trip.
We spent the entire 12-hour drive chatting. My wife and I spend a lot of time together and enjoy each other’s company, but much of that conversation often centres around the practicalities of day-to-day life. Being away from our usual spaces and out of our normal routine, we have a different perspective on our lives and our future — and the time to share them.
The show was great and Schenectady was interesting, one of those American manufacturing towns trying to will its way to a rebirth. But it was the time my wife and I spent together than was truly the most enjoyable part.
Among the many, many things we discussed: we should do more “things” and buy less “stuff.” Especially when it comes to gifts.
Both my wife and I have reached that stage of life where we are somewhat particular in our tastes. I like shirts of a certain cut and style (old man hipster vibe), sweatshirts with open bottoms, and I’m very fussy about my underwear and socks. My lovely bride has long gone out and purchased whatever it is she wants or needs without any advice or guidance from me. Our house already feels cramped with the sheer volume of items we’ve accumulated over the years. Another gift, no matter how well-meaning, just adds to the pile.
But now that the kids are older — one them has even, gasp, moved out — we have the ability to do things, to go on adventures big and small together. I can’t think of a better way to spend our time and money.
My wife can even wear the socks I bought her.