Hodge Podge Mums the word
Today, more than ever, I think we all need to take care of ourselves a little more. We all work hard ,take care of others, do our chores and sometimes we forget to look to ourselves. I for one admit I’m guilty of that and I think it’s high time we started to.
Dads work hard and so do mums, usually when dads come home they get to rest unless they are a single parent single parents work ever harder. But going back to the mums they don’t tend to stop doing chores right until bedtime rolls around.
My husband used to come home, tired, worn and filthy, I would help wash the dirt off of his back whilst he sat in the bath exhausted, I would give him his supper I’d prepared then he’d fall asleep in the sofa for a while before bed as he’d given all his energy at work during the day. I’d have to wake him up to go to bed because he was so spent. Whilst he napped, I’d get the children washed and ready for bed, get them a snack and some milk, find favourite toys and their blankies for them settle them down in their beds and then come downstairs and do the washing up, take the dog out for his nighttime tinkle and then tidy up the front room of toys etc., after that I’d wake him up and I’d get him off to bed. I’d check everything was locked, that the dog was OK and in his basket, that the cat was settled and comfy, got my stuff ready for the next day and then did my husband’s and the children’s lunchboxes and put them in the fridge for the morning. There was always plenty to do before I could even go upstairs. I’d turn off all the lights then climb the stairs, check in the children, go to the bathroom ,brush my teeth etc., Check on the kids again then go into our room. Invariably my husband would need covering up because he’d be so tired he’d fall asleep uncovered so tuck him in, get into bed. Turn out the light, take a nap. I say nap and not go to sleep as I was always listening out for the children, we’re they alright? Did they have a bad dream? did they need a drink of water? have they lost their teddy in the bed somewhere?. it was always a series of naps, sleeping with one eye open my mum called it, which made me laugh, but it’s sort of true.
When the morning arrived, it was up early, make coffee, get things ready for my husband, his breakfast, make sure he had everything he needed that day. Then get the kids up, washed, dressed and breakfasted and off to school , either by walking with my hubby or him taking them in the car. Of course making sure everybody had their reading books or recorder or PE stuff and of course their lunch boxes. After they all left the dog and I would go outside so he could tinkle and I’d sit on the low wall we had surrounding the raised garden bed and drink a coffee whilst the dog played on the grass and generally ran about doing what dogs do.
Next was usually laundry, we had a large family and I used to do it seven days a week.that was alright, I don’t mind it. There was always baking to do for lunchboxes, cake or quiches etc., and the ever present cleaning and vacuuming that you need to do with small children. I found once you got a rhythm going it was easy. Sometimes my husband would call in unannounced which was nice, we’d have a coffee together or lunch if he had time. Then he’d leave again and I’d go back to chores.
Chores are different depending on the time of year. Sometimes bottling and canning, sometimes collecting fruit from your trees or plants, for a time we had some ducks so eggs had to be collected every day, all good stuff, but it takes up your time. I didn’t really have much time to be bored or watch daytime TV which is a good thing I think. There was no social media either back then as the Internet hadn’t really taken over every day life like it has now. I sewed and knitted if I had time, I made a lot of the kids clothes and my mum knitted them some beautiful jumpers/ cardigans/sweaters.
I did a lot of things, except take care of myself, I was too busy caring for everyone else. I’m not sorry about doing that either, I’d do it again tomorrow, you just do it, you don’t think about it. My only regret is I wish I’d put my feet up when I did sit down. I have bad varicose veins because of all the hours of standing up at the sink or cooking, so I say to you dear reader, put your feet up as often as you can. Otherwise I regret nothing.
Us mums do need to take more care of ourselves. It comes to something when your only few moments of peace are when you sit on the loo and that’s usually how it is. Of course the kids and dog and cats do queue up outside the door for you but they are at least on the other side of a door. But they are there, I laugh now when I think back about it, but it was a little stressful at the time.
So when you get the chance, have a nice shower, or a soak in the bath, sit down, put your feet up, do something for you at least once a week, we all matter and us mums have an incredible burn rate, we need to relax too. It’s just hard to get out of the habit of tidying, cleaning, buzzing about. So, sit down girls, relax a little, be good to yourself.
I’m off to have a shower and then maybe a nap, all my chores are done for today, so it’s finally me time, first time in an age.
Take care, look after yourselves, wash your hands, wear a mask if you want to. Above all, please be nice to one another.