Back to School

The pandemic has brought us a new set and arena of worries and stress some of which we have never felt before. Our days now include the worry of germs, sanitization, and masks on top of the multitude of things that sit in the back of our mind. Our children have their worries supplemented by the stress of masks and going back to school after almost two years of staying at home. Their back to school shopping lists and excitement with friends include sanitizer packs with their favourite character and masks to match their outfit. Depending on the age of your child, the back yo school jitters include separation anxiety after being together with the family for such an extended period of time. So what can we do to make this transition smooth and positive for our children?

Validate their Feelings

The first think we must do is validate their feelings when they are worried and stressed about being apart. Your children might be clingy and fearful about the separation along with nervous for meeting old and new friends. It’s important to stay calm and positive during this period. If your child expresses their fear, you should let them feel it and acknowledge it as they are real concerns. Beyond validation, we must help them with their development and brainstorm ways to manage or resolve these fearful feelings.

Help them find their Voice

If your child is expressing these feelings through anger or tantrums, we must help them to communicate it with words and develop it into a conversation. For children, the parents lead the conversation or big changes that take place. They know best in the eyes of the child. If you lead the conversation with stress and anxiety, thats how our children will approach this new chapter. If they are unable to communicate, leading questions help them verbalize their anxiety. If there are questions you cannot answer, options such as making lists or navigating options are good approaches that helps them work through difficult feelings to come to a compromise or solution. Focusing on positivity helps them look for the same when they are approached with a similar manner.

Have a Routine but Practice Flexibility The separation anxiety mainly comes from a drastic change in routine. Our children are now used to us working from the living room or going to their own schools online followed by family time everyday. The change in routine and structure results in panic as the day now has many unknowns. It might help certain children deal with separation in smaller doses such as spending a day with different caregivers or carpooling to daycare or school so the change in routine isn’t as stressful. The shift teaches them to be flexible in the changes that life brings now and in the future.

Change is always uncomfortable and will always need time to feel normal and safe. Prepare yourselves to face a challenging time but with a strong action plan in place. As parents, this period might seem never-ending and some might need help. It’s important to know our limits and recognize when we need the help of others. Reach out to family members, parents of their friends, teachers, and therapists.

Email info at: asmashums@gmail.com