Little Lake purple wave of light to grieve infant loss
Centennial Fountain to turn purple Oct. 15 for International Infant Loss Awareness Day
When Lisa Plouffe went through her two pregnancy losses, she grieved them deeply — and she felt quite alone in her grief.
“These were heartbreaking, isolating and life-altering experiences,” she said.
It wasn’t until a year after her second loss that she learned about a local support group that could help.
The Pregnancy And Infant Loss (PAIL) Network — operated by Sunnybrook Health Sciences Centre in Toronto — has a local group.
Plouffe found so much support and hope there that she took the training through Sunnybrook to facilitate group meetings in Peterborough.
Once a month, Plouffe leads a small group of people — mostly women, although men are welcome — through a 90-minute meeting where they discuss the loss and sometimes create mementoes, such as a bracelet bearing the baby’s name, for instance.
Plouffe said the group is for anyone who has lost a child through miscarriage, stillbirth or SIDS.
“We firmly believe and honour the fact that a loss is a loss — regardless of gestational age or circumstance,” she said.
PAIL offers other resources, too: one-to-one phone support, for example, or groups to help support expectant parents through a subsequent pregnancy, following a loss.
As many as one in five pregnancies end in miscarriage, according to Sunnybrook’s website, and for every 1,000 births in Canada there are six stillborn infants.
International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day happens on Oct. 15, and for the first time this year the city will mark the occasion by lighting the Centennial Fountain in purple, the PAIL official colour — a combination of baby blue and pink.
Plouffe said the CN Tower in Toronto and Niagara Falls have
‘‘ We firmly believe and honour the fact that a loss is a loss -- regardless of gestational age or circumstance. LISA PLOUFFE
been lit in purple on Oct. 15 for years, so she approached the city to see if staff would light the fountain.
They said yes, even though it means keeping the fountain running for an extra week. It’s usually shut down after Thanksgiving.
Plouffe and a friend, Sky Wylie, are also organizing a public gathering at Rogers Cove on the evening of Oct. 15.
Everyone is invited to the Peterborough Wave of Light, which is part of a worldwide event.
The International Wave of Light allows participants to light a remembrance candle at 7 p.m. and leave it burning for an hour; the wave of light then ripples around the world as it traverses different time zones.
The idea is to have a light coursing around the world for 24 hours in remembrance of babies.
Plouffe said the Peterborough Wave of Light is being organized outside of PAIL activities — although group members and others are invited.
It happens to be Plouffe’s 34th birthday on Oct. 15. She said she’s honoured to organize the Wave of Light on that day.
She also encouraged anyone who is dealing with pregnancy or infant loss to reach out for help. Joining PAIL is free.
“I deeply wish I’d known sooner that there was support available for me,” she said. “Pregnancy and infant loss is a journey no one needs to travel alone.”