What do you mean when you say my golf course is quirky?
For courses like British Open host Royal St. George’s, ‘quirky’ is a six-letter, four-letter word for members
The number of times that players described Royal St. George’s as quirky was getting a little tiring. But the point was made. It seemed like it was definitely more than just the opinion of a couple of journalists in search of a story.
This year was the 15th time that the seaside course a couple of hours from London had hosted the Open Championship.
Royal St. George’s is famous for its collection of features that frustrate players who believe golf should be fair.
There’s the aptly named “Suez Canal” that crosses the 14th fairway in a strange location — the same hole that has out of bounds stakes running the entire length of the hole on the right side.
There are too many blind shots to mention. One blind shot makes for a quirky hole. A bunch of them make a quirky golf course.
The sand-filled ridges that surround many fairways at Royal St. George’s run at weird, unforgiving angles, throwing balls struck a little off-line way off line. That’s quirky.
When you unpack the word quirky in this context it’s all about too much being left to chance. That there are simply too many places you find yourself where luck plays a role. Where well-struck, well-intentioned golf shots get you in as much trouble as duck hooks and shanks.
In golf, quirky can be a synonym for unfair. For bad design or bad land. You can be proud of a quirky hole, but no one wants a quirky course.
Telling a member that their golf course is quirky is like telling them their princess of a daughter is ugly.
If you throw the Q-word out there, feelings will be hurt and you will get the followup question, “What do you mean?”
My friend played in a member-guest last week, at a private club that will remain nameless a few-hours drive from Peterborough. Being a well-known and respected sports personality in the area, the members in his group were keen to hear his opinion on their course.
They waited until well into the round to ask him with the confidence of a kid sharing a straight A report card with her parents. My friend hesitated to answer and his silence was awkward.
Instead of answering it directly he decided to share what his good friend had said about the course after playing it for the first time (that friend happened to be me).
“Well, it’s kind of quirky.” When the members had picked their jaws up off the grass they had looks on their faces that my friend was expecting. He knew this wouldn’t stop there.
“What do you mean?”
At that point he started to rhyme off the most obvious support for the bomb he had just dropped. “Let’s start with the two back-to-back par threes we just played. Or there’s the three holes where you have to lay up short of a ravine and end up playing a longer club for your second shot than your drive.”
“But that’s just interesting design,” one of them countered. “It makes you think about which club to hit and that’s just … ”
At that point my friend interrupted by finishing the member’s sentence with an emphatic “QUIRKY.”
It must be noted that my friend cunningly extracted himself from any controversy by noting that what matters most is not that they have a quirky course but that they have a great club.
A wonderful, grand old clubhouse, consistently amazing course conditioning and the kind of people as members that make a club your home away from home. It was a good save. Once a goalie always a goalie.