Trouble at the crossroads
Between Hell and Perdition
I remember driver’s education classes that told us about the rules of the simple four-way stop. The driver who stops at the stop sign first has the right to proceed into the intersection first. If several drivers arrive at the intersection simultaneously, the driver of the car to the right has the right of way.
If the drivers stop simultaneously across from each other, then they should enter into an entente cordiale, consider the intentions of their turn signals and use broad and polite gestures about who should proceed first.
I get all that — until I encountered Four-waygeddon located at the intersection of two small residential routes, Hell Street and Perdition Avenue. Getting there, however, is half the battle.
Facing Hell Street is elementary school No. 666. Hell is open to legal parking along one side. The other is a school drop-off zone. Many parents believe this means they can drop off their cars. If you venture down Hell Street on any weekday morning, expect to see an array of vehicles squaring off head to head, forced into the narrow central runnels by legally parked and abandoned vehicles.
It’s a jolly community centre as well, as the diabolical ambience inspires some drivers to engage in leisurely chats with passersby. Don’t honk your horns, ladies and gents, for nobody cares. It will all get sorted out long after your own child has earned a late slip.
After you’ve backed up a half-dozen times, manoeuvred around numerous derelict vehicles and nosed into tiny crevices to let oncoming traffic pass, you arrive at Four-waygeddon.
There’s a crossing guard there. He makes things wonderful for the children, but not for traffic.
One car clearly arrives first at the four-way stop, but, then, the crossing guard blows his whistle and escorts some children across the street in front of it. After the children pass, should the driver stopped by the guard now proceed immediately or wait to see what everyone else is going to do?
Another car stops first at the intersection, right at the stop sign, but then the driver lets a child off in front of the school. The parent driver has clearly stopped first and has the right to proceed into the intersection — but for how long? Do the rights pass to the next driver the moment the car door opens? Or, does anything make good road sense around here?