Sugar babies symptoms of a larger problem
I have heard of all kinds of ways to pay tuition, from flipping burgers to collecting empties and the dreaded summer job, but a news story last month really took the cake.
Several major Canadian news publications, from Maclean’s to the Toronto Star, talked about how some university students are seeking out “sugar daddies” on the website SeekingArrangement.com to help pay for their university education.
Of course, some students also seek “sugar mommies,” but that number is drastically lower, according to news reports.
At first glance, I thought the article was about younger students seeking men in their chosen careers to help finance their education.
It is not uncommon for men to date younger women, and for women to be interested in guys with good careers, as any dating expert will tell you.
Unfortunately, that’s not what the article was about. The gist of it was that many students were registering on a dating website seeking a sugar daddy to provide them with an “expected” monthly income, in return for their “companionship.”
The total number of university “clients” on the website has risen from 30 per cent to 50 per cent in recent years, according to the site’s founder and CEO, Brandon Wade.
Wade said the average amount a “sugar baby” could expect to earn is $3,000 a month, which they can use towards whatever they desire.
He said his site is similar to other dating websites and that the relationships sometimes lead to marriage.
Call me a skeptic, but whenever money changes hands over romance, it leaves me with a suspicious gut.
The entire thing seems a bit ridiculous to me, and many people’s reactions have been in the same vein.
Some people refer to the arrangements as prostitution, and part of it feels that way to me.
The argument against that is easy enough — sugar daddies are not technically paying for sex, just as escorts are not hookers.
No offense to the sugar babies — or escorts, for that matter — but I don’t imagine too many people believe these girls and guys are not getting money in return for some sort of physical intimacy.
I’m not trying to shame sugar babies, whether they are girls or guys, or make the sugar daddies feel bad, but I think the phenomenon raises a few stark realities about education.
It is also telling that there are an exceptional number of university students from Ontario schools on the website — that province ranks near the top in terms of tuition costs and the sheer size of the student population.
My gripe is that students shouldn’t have to resort to selling their companionship — whether that involves sex or not — so that they can afford to go to school.
This sort of service is disgraceful in some ways, but it represents a reality that many people still do not want to face: many students are struggling to pay for higher education, and are increasingly expected to have that education to get the jobs they want.
There has been a lot of talk about how the student-debt bubble may be the next housing bubble in economics, and yet some people refuse to face just how drastic student debt is becoming.
I could spend all day talking about why it is sad, pathetic or irresponsible for people to sell themselves or their time to lonely, desperate, overly-wealthy people, but that misses the point.
Everyone seems to be railing against the entire idea of students selling themselves this way, but I have not seen anyone, except Wade, address why some students need to do this to afford schooling.
A Toronto Star article said Wade claims to be a “socially inept ‘nerd,’” who struggled to meet women growing up, but he seems to understand the social conditions that have led to the current situation.
Even if Wade and the sugar babies are the ones profiting from this social inequality, at least he understands the issue and is openly discussing it.
Several major Canadian news publications, from Maclean’s to the Toronto Star, talked about how some university students are seeking out ‘sugar daddies’ on the website SeekingArrangement.com to help pay for their university education.