To love him is to know him

I lost my mentor this year. He was my Uncle Bill.

“The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches, but to reveal to him his own,” Benjamin Disraeli said.

Like all mentors who make a difference, his achievement depended not on being detached and objective — but rather from a passionate engagement aimed at revealing the hidden potential within his apprentice.

Uncle Bill loved a drink and late night debate with Leonard Cohen’s “Songs of Love and Hate” as the musical backdrop. With an exquisite handmade pipe in hand, his piercing stare had the effect of truth serum as he coerced latent elements of compassion and self-awareness to the surface.

There are so many stories I could tell about him. This is one of my favourites.

Many years ago, I was a (slightly bohemian) team leader at LeDroit, an Ottawa-Gatineau newspaper. A moment of truth lay before me as I was tasked with the first hire of my career.

I prepared by reviewing the pile of resumés and selecting a total of eight candidates for interviews. I met one-on-one with each candidate in what was, admittedly, an unstructured affair.

That evening, I reviewed my copious notes (which were mixed with several meandering doodles) and tried to make sense of my day. As I was wont to do when faced with an important decision, a call was placed to Uncle Bill. I described my impression of each and read to him from my notes while he listened patiently. I neared the end of my exposition and hesitated as I described the last interview of the day — the one with candidate No. 8 — an impressive mix of experience and leadership. I admitted to Uncle Bill that there was something that left me rather uncomfortable with this one.

He replied matter-of-factly. “I understand”, he said, “You’re uncomfortable because you know that candidate No. 8 could do your job.” He was dead right. “You don’t have to hire him if he makes you feel uncomfortable or insecure,” he added. “Remember that top quality people hire and surround themselves with top quality people. Second-tier people hire third-tier people. And third-tier people prefer to surround themselves with idiots. If you’re not a top quality person — don’t worry about it. You do not have to hire candidate No. 8.”

I was dumbstruck and Uncle Bill said nothing further. He let the awkward silence work like a worm in my brain.

Really, nothing more needed to be said.

The amazing thing is episodes like this one were common with Uncle Bill. His guidance was of such value not because it was impersonal and scientific, but because it came from a stance of love. His purity of intention and brutal honesty combined to tease out in me qualities that I did not know I had. His years of counsel compel me today, in turn, to give what I have been given. I have had the joy of making authentic connections and mentoring many colleagues in my career. In this, I aspire to bring the same engagement and humanity that was modelled for me by my mentor.

(And yes, I hired candidate No. 8.)

Ted Markle, a newspaper industry veteran of more than 30 years and former president of TC Media, is a keen observer of the humourous side of the human situation. He appears in this space every Monday. You can reach him at ted.markle@tc.tc Twitter @tedmarkle