Leftover resolutions
Disclosure: this column is about such an obscenely privileged New Year’s resolution that I am truly ashamed.
This year I am going to throw out perfectly good food.
Now before you stop reading in disgust hear me out. I am not wasteful. I am the opposite of wasteful. I cannot throw out perfectly good food. I am the queen of plan-overs and creative leftovers, but if it doesn’t lend itself to reincarnation as something else and I can’t give it away or freeze it, I put it in the fridge, secure in the belief that I or someone else will eat it.
If it’s enough for another meal just on its own, then I am thrilled that there is at least one morning in my near future that I won’t have to think through the dreaded “what will we have for supper?” But too often it is none of the above, but it is too good to throw out, so I put it in the fridge where
it takes up room until it is not too good to throw out and then I throw it out. Unless of course it gets spilled.
I’ve been trying to avoid the fridge for days now. I avert my eyes every time I take the wine bottle off the shelf in the door. There are green-checked shower caps everywhere.
Some of them have been used so often that the checks are wearing off.
If you’re thinking “what in God’s name is she talking about now” you are obviously not as frugal or environmentally responsible as I am. Or you didn’t have a mother like mine so perhaps you don’t even know that you can buy packs of multi-size plastic bowl covers that are like mini shower caps and drastically cut down on your use of foil or cling wrap.
Bye-bye cling wrap
And speaking of cling wrap, yesterday I threw out an 18inch
roll of cling wrap that I have been using for 12 years. Newman brought it home from a restaurant he closed but he neglected to bring home the dispenser. I can never find the end and when I do it usually tears off higgledy-piggledy.
For 12 years I have struggled with it when a shower cap won’t stretch to the occasion. For 12 years! And there is still no end in sight.
“Off with its head “said the new me. Why have I irritated myself with this all these years and I don’t know anyone I dislike enough to give it to. I had a twinge of guilt about not sawing through to the heavy cardboard centre so I could recycle it properly, but I couldn’t stand looking at it one more minute, let alone go out to get the bucksaw.
I have hollandaise sauce left from Christmas morning. I did use it one more time, but it was still too good to throw out. I have a small dish of chopped ham from a breakfast omelette that I fully intended use for a western sandwich. I have boiled dinner vegetables that we have already eaten three times. (Newman does not know how to peel less than a enough for a schooner’s crew and I’m not about to criticize any cooking activity he does.)
I forgot it was there
I have gravy that I should have frozen, but forgot it was there and even I think I should draw the line at 10-day old gravy.
There are things in the back that I’m afraid to look at.
I have parts of a couple of packs of expensive cured meat that said “Enjoy me tonight” when I bought them before Christmas. I don’t mind that “Enjoy me tonight” business; some things have an expiry date of the next day, and if its sealed its good well beyond tonight, but opened, maybe not so good (even though I haven’t poisoned anyone yet).
Tomorrow’s weather prediction sounds like a stayhome day to me (It doesn’t take much). I will clean out the fridge. I will make room for fresh food and some newer good things that I know I really will use soon.
That doesn’t sound promising, but I really am going to improve.
I have hollandaise sauce lef• from Chris•mas morning. I did use i• one more
•ime, bu• i• was s•ill •oo good •o •hrow ou•. I have a small dish of chopped ham from a breakfas• omele••e
•ha• I fully in•ended use for a wes•ern sandwich. I have boiled dinner vege•ables
•ha• we have already ea•en
•hree •imes.