Man begged child’s mother for permission to kill toddler, court hears
Judge and lawyers agree, criminal case of Ryan Paddle was one of the most disturbing they’ve encountered
Warning: This story contains details that may be disturbing to some readers.
In the spring of 2019, as electronic music industry websites were praising his work and declaring him and his professional partner “dance music’s next big thing,” Ryan Paddle was sitting in a jail cell, charged with a crime based on disturbing events.
On Thursday, as those details were read aloud in a St. John’s courtroom, Paddle — participating in the hearing by video — was sitting at home, reportedly shaking.
“I can’t even fathom that I ever was that person,” he told the court. “I’m shaking every time I hear it and I’m not even remotely close to that person anymore.”
Paddle’s own lawyer, Mark Gruchy, acknowledged it was the most disturbing file he’s ever had and told the court he had searched, upon reading the facts of the case, for some possible explanation for Paddle’s actions. What he found, he said, was not an explanation that excuses Paddle from wrongdoing, but provides context.
Paddle was 19 years old in April 2019, when he and a woman planned to die together by suicide. They went through with the plan, renting a cabin out of town for the purpose, but were stopped by police, who had received a tip. Paddle and the woman were treated in hospital and spent time in psychiatric care before being sent home.
The woman then went to the police with a series of text messages Paddle had sent her in the days leading up to the suicide attempt, in which he had begged her to let him kill her toddler.
“It’s clearly one of the strangest cases I’ve dealt with in my career. It’s disturbing. However, the child wasn’t harmed and the child is young enough that (they) may never know this occurred. I hope that (the child’s) parents do not tell (them) at any point that this ever happened.”
Judge James Walsh
“That way there will be no burden and we will be legends,” he wrote, describing how he planned to kill the child. “People will do cult things about us. I want to write it in several books and then send them to different libraries. I want to ascend to a divine place. Please let me have that luxury.”
Paddle told the woman the child was his “last enemy” and “Just thinking about it puts a smile on my face.”
The woman responded, telling Paddle they couldn’t kill other people.
“I have to,” he wrote. “I’ll be doing it by myself. I’ll let you come to peace with that until you want to talk to me again. But don’t respond with anything but yes…. I can walk into (a relative’s home) and do it and then get you, and you will be left wondering whether I did it or not.”
Police arrested Paddle and charged him with uttering threats against the child. He was denied bail and spent two months in Her Majesty’s Penitentiary before the Crown consented to his release, based on a change in circumstances that led them to feel it was appropriate.
Typically, a 19-year-old with no criminal record and a decent bail plan charged with uttering threats would be released right away, prosecutor Jessica Gallant said Thursday, suggesting it spoke to the seriousness of the crime that Paddle was not.
“It’s very disturbing and I can see why bail was denied and I don’t have much sympathy for Mr. Paddle when it comes to that,” Judge James Walsh replied.
Paddle’s apparent romanticizing and fantasizing about killing the child made his threats much more concerning than a typical case,” Gallant said.
“It isn’t simply a reactionary threat like we often see in this court, provoked by someone who insulted you or (during) an altercation with an individual in your life. This is an innocent child. And that’s what makes the facts of this so disturbing.”
Gruchy provided the judge with a package of documents he said offered insight into Paddle’s life at the time he made the threats. The package included online articles and posts related to Diemetic, an electronic dance music duo consisting of Paddle and Andrew Heffernan. The duo had achieved success in the genre, signing to a U.K. music label, touring around Europe and getting endorsements by top international DJS.
“That’s not to say he did a great thing so we should feel pity for him, but it is to say that from a very early age, really getting underway in earnest when he was 17, Mr. Paddle was in a very atypical life for a teenager,” Gruchy said. “He was travelling, he was performing, he was associating with people far older than him. It was beyond the norm for his peers and then at the apex of all this activity, this inexplicable and horrible thing happened.”
Paddle has since legally signed the rights to his music over to Heffernan, with whom he now has no contact, to continue with the Diemetic brand alone.
“I don’t have much to say, really, other than I wish him the best in his future endeavours,” Heffernan told The Telegram when contacted for comment.
Gruchy told the court Paddle has turned his back on his music career and his past acquaintances and has moved to rural Newfoundland where he cares for elderly relatives and has converted to the Jehovah’s Witness faith. He has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and is receiving treatment for the first time in his life, Gruchy said.
“I don’t think this is ever going to happen in Ryan Paddle’s life again. I really don’t. I think this is the quintessential one-off that is incredibly difficult to understand without reference to the very strange circumstances that he and (the woman) were in,” Gruchy told the judge.
Walsh denied Gruchy’s suggestion of a discharge for Paddle as well as Gallant’s suggestion for a suspended sentence, saying neither of them would serve the public’s best interest or act as a general deterrent, nor would they reflect the seriousness of the case. He sentenced Paddle to 86 days time served and 12 months of probation and implemented Gallant’s suggested orders for a DNA sample, a 10-year firearm ban and no contact with the woman, her child and another family member.
When it comes to sentencing, the courts are bound by law to issue sentences that comply with those set out in the Canadian Criminal Code, as well as sentences consistent with those given previously across the country in similar circumstances.
“It’s clearly one of the strangest cases I’ve dealt with in my career,” Walsh said. “It’s disturbing. However, the child wasn’t harmed and the child is young enough that (they) may never know this occurred. I hope that (the child’s) parents do not tell (them) at any point that this ever happened.”