Job loss ends af­fair with co-worker

The Western Star - - LIFE - Abi­gail Van Buren

DEAR ABBY: Back in 2013, a co-worker, “Jamie,” and I fell in love. Both of us were mar­ried to other peo­ple, but every­thing felt per­fect. It was a feel­ing I never had for any­one in my life be­fore. Three years later, I lost my job. The day I was ter­mi­nated, my wife found out I had been cheat­ing, so I ended the af­fair.

I have found full-time work and I’m still mar­ried, but I’m not in love with my wife like I am with Jamie. I have tried to stay in con­tact with her to prove to her that I’m a bet­ter man, with lit­tle suc­cess. She told me I was her only love, but I broke her heart.

She doesn’t want to see me, even af­ter sev­eral years of my try­ing to prove that I am the man she fell in love with. Her hus­band doesn’t know any­thing. She’s afraid I may break it off again. Should I con­tinue pur­su­ing her or give up and move on? I thought I could han­dle it on my own, but I need some ad­vice. — MISS­ING HER IN ON­TARIO, CANADA

DEAR MISS­ING HER: If you and Jamie re­ally loved each other, you would no longer be mar­ried to your spouses. Hav­ing been dumped by you once, your for­mer lover has a point. Give up and move on and you will save your­self, your wife, Jamie and her hus­band a lot of pain.

DEAR ABBY: I’m a pe­di­atric RN at a large hospi­tal. Sadly, I have seen too many young chil­dren die. I have learned to keep a pro­fes­sional dis­tance, so that I can take care of the chil­dren and their fam­i­lies. I never give out my phone num­ber, so­cial me­dia or email ad­dress, and I try not to let the par­ents ever see my strug­gle. But ev­ery once and a while, I can’t help car­ing be­yond “pro­fes­sional.”

We just lost a beau­ti­ful lit­tle one who had spent a year and a half re­ceiv­ing care off and on in the hospi­tal, and I’m heart­bro­ken. The fam­ily has asked for nurses and doc­tors to at­tend the fu­neral, and I re­ally want to. But how do I ex­plain why I go to some fu­ner­als and not oth­ers? — HEART­BRO­KEN ONCE AGAIN

DEAR HEART­BRO­KEN: You don’t have to ex­plain. I can’t imag­ine any­one ac­tu­ally count­ing the num­ber of fu­ner­als/me­mo­ri­als you at­tend and ask­ing a ques­tion like that. How­ever, if any­one should, say that you can’t at­tend them all be­cause the loss of these lit­tle an­gels takes such a heavy toll on your heart. It’s the truth. DEAR ABBY: My late wife passed away two years ago. We al­ways had a dog in our house. He died a year ago. I now have a new lady love in my life, but she doesn’t want a pet in her house. I’m dy­ing to have an­other dog, and I don’t know what to do. Please ad­vise. — PETLESS IN TEXAS

DEAR PETLESS: El­i­gi­ble wid­ow­ers are a prized com­mod­ity. If your idea of hap­pi­ness is hav­ing a house dog, find your­self a lady who loves an­i­mals as you do. It shouldn’t be dif­fi­cult. Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abi­gail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Con­tact Dear Abby at or P.O. Box 69440, Los An­ge­les, CA 90069.

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