The fine art of building a sporting vehicle

LAST WEEK, I BOUGHT a new (to me) SUV. And perhaps the only person happier was Jenn.

You see, we arrived at a point about three years ago when Jenn would only ride in my old SUV during blizzards that prohibited her from using her vehicle. And then only if she didn’t feel like snowshoeing.

There was something about my vehicle that did not appeal to her. Once, I asked her what the problem was, and she went on to tell me it smelled like a mixture of fish, wet dog, skunk cover scent, live bait, dead game birds, beef jerky and bear attractant. Which was nice of her to say, but she never did answer the question.

She was right though. My old SUV had taken on the air of a sportsman’s vehicle. When I recently cleaned it before trading it in, I found bits of deer hair, kibble, feathers from ducks, grouse, woodcock and turkeys as well as fishing flies, spools of line and empty shotshell cases. Also there was a popup blind, ice fishing sled, ladle and

auger. Oh, and a few duck and deer calls and enough hunter orange and camouflage clothing to get me through three hunting seasons.

I won’t lie to you: as I removed these things, my eyes welled up, although not so much when the breeze picked up.

Aside from this, that old SUV was the kind of vehicle anyone would want to spend time in – provided you don’t mind having to share the front seat with a turkey vest and a couple of decoys.

My new SUV is still a blank canvas, however. Right now it only has a fishing vest, a net, and a few fly boxes in the back. I still bring the rod and reel inside because I feel like I shouldn’t provide too much temptation for all those thieves who can’t wait to get their hands on a 10-foot-6inch nymphing rig.

Other than that my new vehicle is still very clean and uncluttered and, since I bought it with very low mileage. It even has that new car smell.

Yet, and I still can’t figure this out, Jenn really enjoys riding in it.

This, I guess, is a good sign – because if she likes it now, just imagine how much she’ll enjoy it when I finally add a few personal touches like sweat-stained waders, mud-covered boots and my old fishing hat.

Of course, there’s no great rush to get there.

As most outdoorsmen know, a fishing and hunting vehicle is like Rome in that it is a) not built in a day and b) there is a very real possibility that it will eventually smell like an open sewer.

I’m excited about this, of course. A new SUV conjures up thoughts of ranging a little farther than the tow allowance on the old one permitted. And the back, once seats are folded down, is big enough that a fellow my size could take an afternoon nap there too, should the fishing slow down.

Soon, hunting season will also arrive and arrows, cover scents, tree stands and duck decoys will find a “temporary” home there. In the meantime, I’ll figure out the best way to put a canoe on top so that I don’t miss out on summer bass. That way, I’ll have an excuse to throw a few lengths of rope and a couple of ratchet straps in the back too.

The point, I guess, is that this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship. If I play my cards right, one day in the near future, when a blizzard prevents her from driving her own car, Jenn will look forward to riding in my vehicle – but only because her snowshoes are buried somewhere in the back.