A little kid said to me: ‘I like your big body’
I watched an interview with Stranger Things actor David Harbour, who plays Hopper on the show. He was discussing being included in pop-culture lists of sexy men.
He was also included in a viral meme as being the definition of “dad bod.” He said that he wants to normalize different body types in the media.
I remember being a child watching teen shows such as the first season of Beverly Hills 90210. I thought that when I was a teenager, I would look like the teenagers I saw on the screen. I did not realize that they were in their 20s and hand-picked beautiful people.
When I was in my teens, I remember looking around my high school and realizing that television was not depicting reality. I was disappointed. Sounds silly but it is true.
Representation matters, and I have never looked like any of the teens on the shows I watched.
There were points in my life where I felt like I wasn’t good enough because I didn’t resemble the people that I wanted to.
Television and film have made strides in diversifying characters’ cultures, sexuality, religion and body types.
A couple of years ago, I was picking my daughter up from a day camp that she’d never been to before. I arrived straight from work, and was standing with other parents waiting for their children.
A little girl who was five or six years old walked up to me.
“I like your big body,” she said with a very wholesome and welcoming smile.
Her mother looked embarrassed and quickly said to her daughter: “Yes, she has a beautiful dress.”
“No, not her dress, I like her big body!”
I smiled at the little girl and said “Thank you.”
I think that was the first time I’d been complimented on my “big body.” The little girl was being honest and kind.
I thought to myself jokingly: “I wish more people loved my big body.”
The bold statement came from a child who didn’t see anything wrong with my body and was being kind.
When I was younger, I wouldn’t want to try things because of my size, even if my size didn’t directly have anything to do with it. I would tell myself that when I was smaller, I would try those things.
I’ve gained and lost weight throughout the years, and one thing I learned was I only have one body so I should appreciate it, and it shouldn’t be an excuse to not do things.
I am not promoting obesity or unhealthy habits. That is an entirely different conversation.
I am promoting including a variety of body types in our visual media. By changing the narrative, we demonstrate to the next generation that everyone has a place and a purpose, not just those with the standard Hollywood body type.
It was incredible to have that child tell me she liked my body; no one had ever said that to me before. I also want to note that it was innocent, coming from a small child. It would make me uncomfortable if adults walked up to me and commented on my body.
I have a good friend who has a policy of not commenting on people’s bodies unless the individual brings it up. I follow this myself, as well.