Torso mystery recalls Dec. 6’ s legacy
Sometime in early November, a woman disappeared and no one noticed. No friend, no family member, no co- worker or neighbour has come to Toronto police since the Nov. 12 discovery of a severed torso and legs of a white, middle- aged female to say they might know who she is, leading police to believe she is the victim of spousal abuse.
Experts in the field of violence against women say the circumstances certainly fit the profile of an abusive situation.
“ This is entirely possible,” says Pamela Cross, legal director of the Ontario Women’s Justice Network. “ In many instances of abuse, one of the strategies of the abuser is to isolate the victim. There are very few people left to know you are gone.”
Cross, a lawyer, says she once had a client who had not been allowed to leave her home for 15 years and whose husband took the telephone with him to work each day so she couldn’t contact anyone. It was only the intervention of her grown children that got her out of that situation.
“ Many have been cut off not just from friends but from family,” says Cross, adding that some abusers threaten to hurt the victim’s family so she severs all ties in order to protect them.
“ It might take months or years before family that haven’t heard
from her start asking questions.” Tomorrow is the 16th anniversary of the Montreal Massacre when gunman Marc Lepine killed 14 women at l’École Polytechnique in Montreal. It will be marked by events throughout the country and here, in Toronto, there will be a noon ceremony at the University of Toronto’s Hart House, organized by Connie Guberman, status of women officer. Guberman says the public has become much more aware of gender violence in the ensuing years.
“ Our awareness and consciousness of all the forms of violence against women has greatly increased. That event galvanized people. Twenty years ago we didn’t want to hear about violence.
“ Today, one of the things we are looking at more is the violence between men and women in intimate relationships.”
( While assault from a stranger is terrifying, the reality of women’s lives is that they are more likely to be assaulted by someone they know intimately, with 20 women in the GTA dying at the hands of their partners in the past year.) Men isolate women in order to maintain control over them, notes Guberman, who says the unclaimed dead woman could possibly be from such a situation.
“ We have to ask that question. In an intimate relationship of violence, there is gradual and continual isolation of that woman. Her neighbours make think she’s meek. Or, ( the husband) has said his wife has up and left.” She points to the massive manhunt for Alicia Ross, who went missing one evening this summer and whose parents knew she wouldn’t just leave without saying where she was going. Her body was found later and a neighbour was charged with her death. Women usually don’t just disappear, Guberman says, and the lack of outcry over this missing woman speaks volumes about her level of isolation.
“ How can some women’s lives have no meaning to us?”
If the woman was new to Canada or had moved from elsewhere, it would also explain why no one in Toronto seems to know her, says Lucya Spencer, executive director of the Immigrant Women’s Services in Ottawa.
“ Because this country is a big one, she may not be from Toronto but another city or province. Is she an immigrant or a Canadian? No one knows.” Immigrant women can be vulnerable to abusive partners when they are sponsored by that person, says Spencer. As well, language barriers and a lack of understanding about Canadian services can keep them within a violent marriage. Some cultures may condone violence against women, says Spencer, adding, “The whole concept of ( unacceptable) violence may be new. Certain things may be accepted in countries from which they came. Here, they are crimes.”
All of these factors result in women staying in abusive situations, she says.
In spite of these issues, Spencer says it seems incredible that no one
would question a
woman’s absence.
“ Somebody
should know your
whereabouts.”
Eileen Morrow, co-ordinator of the Ontario Association of Interval and Transition Houses, says an abuser “ terrorizes” his victim to make sure “ she tells no one. No one else knows. In that circumstance, it could look like she’d just left him.”
There are other circumstances, which may contribute to the lack of identification of this victim, she says.
“ If she’s not working, it’s possible that no one will be aware she’s gone. If there are no children, then he has complete control and ownership of her. Murder is the ultimate control.”
Noting the police comment that the woman’s killer probably had help cutting up and distributing her body, Morrow points out that at least one other person does know the identity of the victim.
Poverty often keeps women in abusive situations, she adds, as they lack the resources to find and pay for food and accommodation for their families.
“ We won’t change abuse until we change the conditions of women’s lives.” Morrow, Cross, Guberman and Spencer all attended a provincial conference in Toronto last week titled Finding Common Ground: Working Together to Reduce Domestic Violence.
In a grim reminder of the purpose of the event, an organizer announced that a woman had been killed on the eve of the conference. Mary Davis, 25, was found dead from a gunshot wound on Nov. 27 in her home on Manitoulin Island. Her spouse, Brent Kells, 21, has been charged with first- degree murder. Noting that Davis had two young children, Morrow says, “ What about the children left behind and the families involved? It does a lot of destruction.”
See status- women. utoronto. ca for more on Toronto’s Dec. 6 activities.
See www.swc-cfc.gc.ca/dates/ dec6/ calendar_ e. html for events around the province.