POP GOES THE WEEK
In wonderfully romantic news, Lady Gaga and Taylor Kinney got engaged on Valentine’s Day Perhaps somewhat surprisingly, the wedding will be a very traditional affair during which the bride will be wearing a simple white dress with veil and spiders.
Stephen Amell of The Arrow complains that, while at a restaurant, he had to shield his toddler daughter’s eyes from a celebrity he describes as an “overly sexualized velociraptor” Unfortunately, he clutched his pearls too hard while commanding Satan to get behind him, broke the string, choked on a pearl and therefore his daughter is now condemned to a life of sin.
This week in Game of Thrones 1) George R.R. Martin says that characters still alive in the books may die in the upcoming season. 2) A Game of Thrones Collector’s Edition of Monopoly will soon be available. 3) Lena Headey a.k.a. Queen Cersei is pregnant. 4) The Maritimes and New England look like the Lands Beyond the Wall. 5) My custom-made Countdown to Season 5 Calendar is so not proof I’m a “weird child,” mom.
Kanye West’s ex Amber Rose said Tyga dating Kylie Jenner after leaving Kim Kardashian’s former BFF Blac Chyna is “ridiculous.” Then Khloe Kardashian tweeted that former stripper Amber has no business telling anyone else their business. Then Amber tweeted that Kim is a “whore,” compared herself to Jesus and insinuated O.J. Simpson is Khloe’s dad. Then Kanye said he had to take “30 showers” after dating Amber This was the worst possible week to find out that I’m not on the shortlist for the one-way trip to Mars.
Jamie Dornan says it’s totally not true that he and Fifty Shades of Grey co-star Dakota Johnson can’t stand each other “It’s a ridiculous notion. I would never utter phrases such as ‘makes my skin crawl’ and ‘icky girl is icky’.”
James Franco is being paid $85,000 for an hour of speaking at University of Florida So that comes to about $9,000 per thought and $5,000 for expenses.
Jack White says it’s totally not true that his tour rider demands a particular kind of guacamole “It’s a ridiculous notion. I would never insist to have it made with truffles, three teaspoons of cayenne, a generous heap of tepid sheep’s fat and kept at precisely 18.2 degrees for 36 minutes.”
A Utah woman wants Guinness Book of Records to recognize that she’s caught 46 bridal bouquets at weddings She also has a great chance of being recognized in the “spends too much damn time at weddings” and “cries herself to sleep while using old pizza as a pillow” categories.
The youth-targeting BBC 1 Radio says it’s totally not true it has banned Madonna’s songs due to her age “It’s a ridiculous notion. We would never ban anyone just because they’re super-old and way past their prime and have one and a half wrinkled old-lady legs in the grave.”