STAR

Cover: Turns out celebrity moms cope OK with fame and wealth: To make sure the kids aren’t spoiled, they’re burdened with humiliating names like Kai (Naomi Watts), Emme (J.Lo), or Moroccan (Mariah Carey). However, Honey Boo Boo’s mother gets called out by an anonymous “insider” as the “laziest” mom and “completely selfish.” Who do you think this righteous unnamed source close to Mama June is? My guess: Tilda Swinton. From here to paternity: Arnold Schwarzenegger’s cleaning lady has a son who has just graduated from high school and, yes, he does look suspiciously like he’d be comfortable taking his shirt off and ruining a good movie by speaking. Dept. of who cares: Paula Deen’s going broke.