Does raising children make you happy?

Re The myth of the happy new parent, Aug. 14 I found the article on child rearing very disheartening to say the least. It would seem, based on the findings, that most parents are unlikely to have more than one child. As this study was done in Germany, it’s hard to know if the same results would be found in other countries but one can assume that it’s likely.

Given these results, we are ensuring a continuing drop in population over time — a sad commentary on the continuation of our western democratic world.

I also assume that the fact that women give birth later in life now than in the past and that the majority of them work outside the home is at least part of the reason for their unhappiness.

I have four grown children and while raising them was not always easy, my recollection is that, for the most part, I enjoyed being a mother and raising my kids. Most of the child-rearing was left to me, as my husband, a doctor, worked long hours and was seldom home during their waking hours.

Granted, I was very young when my first child was born and didn’t work outside the home until my youngest was 8. Nevertheless, though the learning curve was steep, I enjoyed motherhood and chose to have all four children.

Maybe it’s time for young people to reconsider having children at a younger age. Possibly at that stage the fatigue is less and the joy greater. Frances Weingarten, Toronto

I admit to feeling somewhat happy as I read this article. It confirms my longheld belief that having children does not make most parents happier. I come by this opinion honestly, having raised two children now both in their early 20s.

Sadly, I discovered that sharing my feelings on this topic with other parents or close friends often led to personal attacks and insinuations regarding my so-called lack of character. For years these encounters left me hurt and confused over their shock and flat-out denial that they might share my feelings.

It has taken years for me to realize that they aren’t better parents or better human beings than I am, just better liars. Karen Townsend, Toronto