Kathy and Jordan
Kathy is a 29-year-old salesperson who lives in Little Italy. She says, “I’m very positive. I see the silver lining in any situation. I never let negativity bring me down.” Kathy describes her style as “relaxed, as much as it’s possible” and herself as “cute,” “very funny” and “sporty.” Kathy says she loves binge-watching crime procedurals, hanging out with friends and trying new things.
I met a good-looking guy, Jordan, at a work-related networking event. He was older, never married, no kids and seemed content with the life of a bachelor. He asked me out, and I said no at first. I was concerned about our age difference; the whole thing seemed like a mid-life crisis waiting to happen. However, he was relentless, and asked me out many times: coffee, lunch, dinner, a movie. I finally accepted. I did tell him while we were making plans that under no circumstances would anything “happen” beyond a nice meal.
We were set to meet at a coffee shop at seven to make our nearby dinner reservation at eight. I showed up on time, but then found myself waiting for Jordan for almost two hours. I texted him to see what was going on, and he told me that he was cleaning his place in case I decided to spend the night. For the hundredth time, I told him that that wasn’t going to happen. Then he texted me a picture of his outfit and asked what I thought. At that point, I really didn’t care, and wondered why I had agreed to this date at all. I told him impatiently that he should hurry up and just meet me at the restaurant.
When he finally arrived, our reservation long expired, we couldn’t get a table and had to try somewhere else. I had committed to dinner, but I had an exit strategy lined up: I ordered a salad to make things move quickly so I could get out of there. Jordan hemmed and hawed over the menu, finally ordering steak, along with a couple of glasses of wine. He commented on my order, and asked me if I was “one of those girls” who doesn’t eat on a date. Why can’t a gal just enjoy some salad? Even if I hadn’t planned on it, as a vegetarian that was my only option on the menu.
Throughout the entire meal Jordan talked about his relationship with his ex, and about their former sex life. He continued to ask me about my comfort level with various sexual topics, which was inevitably followed by an awkward silence on my part.
At one point, he paused our conversation to text his ex. When he wasn’t talking about her, it was about himself, his job and another woman that he had dated.
Jordan could tell that I wasn’t amused by how often I checked the time on my phone. Knowing he wouldn’t score with me, he got on his phone to make plans with someone else, and then had the nerve to hand me a subway token! He paid the bill, and we left.
For some reason, once we were outside, Jordan made an attempt to salvage the date. He leaned in for a kiss while he was hailing a cab, and when it stopped, he pulled me in with him. I went along with it. He asked me to come back to his place for a drink. I agreed. I don’t really know why I did, but I was having more fun after he realized I wasn’t into him. Also, it was too late by then to make other plans with someone else. In the cab, he leaned over to the driver and gave him a different address. We stopped outside of a sex club, and Jordan asked me if I wanted to go in. I guess he had abandoned his plan with whoever he texted!
I didn’t have time to mull it over. I was nervous, but curious. I thought a sex club would be populated with the old and the desperate. Jordan paid for us to go in. There were various degrees of nakedness, and people socializing or involved in different sex activities. It was a diverse crowd, but to be honest, I wasn’t attracted to anyone. Jordan started making out with me, kissing and touching me while I was up against the wall, and I basically decided at that point to call it a night. His plan to surprise me or impress me with a “sex club” didn’t go as planned — much like the rest of the date.
The next day, he texted me to complain about the money he spent on our date since he didn’t get lucky. We never talked again.
Kathy rates her date (out of 10): 4 Want to be a dating diarist? Email datingdiariescontact@gmail.com