Taking private calls in public washrooms
No matter who’s phoning you, sometimes it’s better to let it go to voicemail and call them back
Your phone rings while you’re in the toilet stall at work. Do you answer it?
I’m going to have to say no, for the sake of the person on the other line as well as those in the stalls next to you.
I mean, the person calling you has no idea that they’ve caught you at such an inconvenient time and they might be mortified (and/or reasonably grossed out) to know what you’re up to. Respect their modesty, if not your own.
Washrooms in general and toilets in particular are super private places where nothing so public as a phone call should go on.
Just silence it, let it go to voicemail and return the call when you’re (literally) in a better position to answer. If you are introduced to someone and recognize them from Tinder, should you bring it up? What a question for the ages. Are you comfortable being the other half of the two people that met on Tinder?
If you’re in the elevator with your boss, maybe no. If you’re out with friends and they are too (bonus points if they’re even cuter in person than in their Tinder profile), then why not?
A little playful acknowledgment of why you might look familiar might give you a sense of just how quick on their toes they are and if they have any flirting game.
The point of Tinder is to find someone swoony in real life.
I’d say if the setting feels appropriate and you actually want to chat with them, why not? I recently had a housewarming party and I didn’t expect people to bring gifts. What’s worse, I totally lost track of who brought what. How do I write thank-you notes now?
That’s sort of a nice problem to have (surprise presents, yeah!), but I totally understand your worry. I’d feel the same concern.
You have three ways you could approach this, in order of best to worst idea.
Enlist a friend to help you do some sleuthing. Explain the pickle you’re in to a trusted friend and hopefully, they’ll help you. If there are eight items you need to find the giver of, they could start by asking a few people if they know who bought the toaster.
The process of elimination should prevail.
You could ask people yourself by explaining how embarrassed and awkward you feel, but if you call up someone who didn’t get you a gift, it can get weird. They might now feel like a jerk because you’ve done an inventory of who brought a gift and they didn’t.
Just move on and not send any thankyou notes at all. Please don’t do this. Even if you get three thank-you notes out in the mail accurately, that’s great. Even better, though more laborious, is to send a thank-you note to all of your guests that came to your housewarming. That way, everyone feels the love. Etiquette expert Karen Cleveland answers your questions about life online. You can email your questions to: karen@mannersaresexy.com.