Creating an inclusive prom for LGBTQ youth

Many don’t feel comfortable at traditional school dance

Pride month is a time for celebration. But for some LGBTQ youth it can be difficult finding a space to celebrate their identity and the end of the school year — and high school dances aren’t always the best place to party.

So when Nate Turarie discovered Pride Prom, he was relieved to have found a place where he would feel safe and accepted.

“In your youth you’re finding out a lot about yourself, like your sexuality and gender. But the tough thing is, during Pride, the events are mostly for adults. So it’s really difficult as a youth to celebrate yourself during Pride.”

Pride Prom, organized by Supporting Our Youth (SOY), a program out of the Sherbourne Health Centre, aims to remove that discomfort and allow LGBTQ youth a chance to celebrate. The event is one of few in Ontario geared specifically for LGBTQ youth to celebrate pride, and it receives 150 to 200 attendees.

Pride Prom is similar to a high school dance, but it’s a “special space where youth get to be who they are,” SOY co-ordinator Clare Nobbs said.

She said high school proms are becoming more inclusive but it’s still common for LGBTQ youth to feel alienated. With traditions like prom king and queen or music solely about heterosexual romance, Turarie said prom can cause even more discomfort and exclusion for LGBTQ youth.

When he went to his friend’s prom three years ago, it wasn’t exactly a night to remember.

“It was an absolutely terrible experience for me. I didn’t get harassed or get terrible glares — which is good — I wasn’t scared but I still didn’t feel comfortable,” he said. “A lack of fear doesn’t mean happiness.”

Pride Prom allows participants to bring as many friends as they wish and dress however they like.

Turarie said this will be his second time participating and volunteering at the event. “I know I’m going to have fun and have a good time. I know I’m going to be happy and I’m going to feel safe and that I can walk up to someone, have a conversation with them, and know for sure that they’ll accept me.”

On Monday, about 30 youth took advantage of a haircut and styling event prior to the dance.

This is the first year SOY has teamed up with the Dress Code Project, a group of hair salons that provide an inclusive space for the LGBTQ community to get a haircut.

Dress Code founder and co-owner of Fuss Hair Salon, Kristin Rankin, created the project two years ago to counter discrimination some LGBTQ clients experience at hair salons. She said LGBTQ customers are often turned away because their preferred haircut doesn’t coincide with a salon’s gender prices. She said a more inclusive salon charges based on hair length rather than gender.