Cage’s trip to Kazakhstan gives us perfect image of life’s absurdity
Thank you, Nicolas Cage, for reminding us that life is absurd.
The future is impossible to predict. Destiny is not without detour. And anyone, including a Hollywood star, can be forced to deviate from a chosen path. One day you’re riding your big-budget filmography to the top of the material world. And the next, you are a meme for the ages after getting photographed in a fur hat, traditional Kazakh robe and a lost expression that captures the spirit of these wretched times.
The photo of Cage, his finest work in years, emerged this weekend from Kazakhstan, where he is attending the Eurasia International Film Festival.
Why is he there? Since he’s not promoting a film, it’s not entirely clear. Though in the last 48 hours, he has helped plant trees, given a talk to college students, bumped shoulders with local politicians and, generally speaking, left the impression he may have ingested a hallucinogenic substance during a mind-control experiment.
“I would be pleased to participate in some film project on the territory of Kazakhstan,” Cage reportedly told a press conference, sounding more staccato than usual.
“I enjoyed the architecture of your capital. It looks great. What I saw reminded me of an old black-and-white film that depicted the future.”
Then came the photo that rained joy and mirth on the planet.
Cage is standing next to a woman in a white blazer and skirt who was identified in several media stories on Monday as “the country’s First Lady Sara Nazarbayeva,” which is likely to come as a shock to Kazakh violinist Aiman Musakhodjaeva. He is wearing a long coat that is belted up a like a hotel robe with a gold-embossed pattern on the flaps and sleeves.
Photo in traditional Kazakh garments is actor’s best work in years
His arms are straight down, like a toy action figure still trapped in the box. On his feet, black trainers. On his head, a plush covering usually reserved for nomadic riders who navigate the Central Asian plains on horseback after dusk and don’t know a Con Air from a Leaving Las Vegas.
But the key to this memorable photo — and the reason I will keep a copy tucked in my wallet for the rest of my days — is the faraway look in Cage’s eyes. He is you. He is me. He is all of us. As with the Sad Ben Affleck meme of last year, the image was captured during a split-second when this gifted actor can’t hide what he’s truly feeling. At the other end of the toxic scale, Nicolas Cage is the very picture of baffled masculinity, a man reduced to a toddler who must wear what his mother says or else.
Looking like he just botched a grains-export deal with shady Russian industrialists, Cage appears to have slipped through a crack in the space-time continuum, ending up on a marble floor in a country where, inexplicably, the locals scream out “Nicky!” and rush forth with biscuits, tea and nagging queries about Adaptation.
In this photo, Cage is anyone who has not belonged and tried a bit too hard to fix that. He is anyone who has been struck by the absurdity of life. He is anyone who has expected something to turn out one way and then, after catching his reflection in a mirror, suddenly realized those expectations were gravely at odds with reality.
But on the verge of becoming another meme, Crying LeBron James, Cage is trying to keep it together. He bravely stares into the middle distance with stoic resolve, as if waiting for the perfect moment to blink out his mayday before his captors force him back into the sweatshop to resume cutting rugs into cosies.
“Nicholas (sic) Cage was very pleased with the Kazakh shapan. He said that both the fabric and the color are good.” NEWS AGENCY KAZINFORM COVERING THE MOVIE STAR’S VISIT TO KAZAKHSTAN
“What the hell am I doing here?” his eyes ask. “How did this happen to me?” He is the Ikea Monkey of 2017: scared, lost, intriguingly welldressed and in dire need of rescue.
And in this age of confusion, he is all of us.
“Nicholas (sic) Cage was very pleased with the Kazakh shapan,” reported the news agency Kazinform, raising the possibility propaganda and fake news has spread to Eurasia. “He said that both the fabric and the color are good. According to him, he can even act in a film.”
I fear that last sentence was lost in translation.
But in the future, whenever I feel down, I will stare into those eyes and remember how much worse it could be. vmenon@thestar.ca