Nice lunch, then bizarre turn
Dawn is a 42-year-old medical professional who lives in the west end. She says “I feel best in bright colours and patterns. I would describe my style as fashionable, but clothes have to be flattering to my body shape first, my personal taste comes second, and trends are third.” Dawn says she is “Nurturing, upbeat and outgoing, and a bit of a perfectionist.” She says “I like working on home-decor projects, including painting furniture and other DIY stuff. I always enjoy a good movie. Dinner parties with a group of friends and a few good bottles of wine are a definite go-to for me.”?
Dating sites are my go-to, but hardly any of my relationships progress past the “coffee” stage. Can’t blame a girl for having high expectations. I like men who are dependable, have a sense of humour, know how to have fun and can have a great conversation. I think it’s important to be able to contribute something unique to the relationship. My personal pet peeve is guys wearing running shoes.
It’s always the picture that gets your attention first. The profile is next. They can’t have any spelling mistakes; that will have me clicking away immediately. They shouldn’t be too wordy, because who has time for that? The profile should just be something catchy and real. And when they message you, it shouldn’t be a bunch of pickup lines.
Kevin passed those tests easily. He sent me a message asking what I was doing that day. I’m a huge proponent of meeting early as opposed to texting or chatting forever, and I had a totally free afternoon, so I asked if he wanted to grab some lunch. Meals are usually a first-date taboo in my books, because if the chemistry isn’t there, you have to sit and power through your food. Also, it was a gorgeous day. I chose this great restaurant that I knew would have a good date vibe.
I waited outside the restaurant and saw Kevin coming down the street. The physical attraction was there right away. He was so handsome, with gorgeous hair. Awesome. I thought, “this is going to be good!” He was nicely dressed. Good shoes. He hugged me hello. He smelled great.
We grabbed a table and the conversation just flowed. It is rare to have that level of connection on a first date. I felt a glimmer of hope. When lunch came and we were still talking, the conversation turned to what we were each looking for in a relationship.
The conversation got very flirtatious and there was a lot of touching across the table. The type of touching where you know there is definite interest. I knew it was too early to tell, but wow, it had been a long time since I met someone so attractive, who can actually hold up their side of a normal conversation.
Then, bam. Out of nowhere it was all over. While we were delving into a very flirtatious part of the conversation, including what we both like behind closed doors — nothing too specific, just things like “Where is the strangest place you’ve ever done the deed?” — Kevin started talking about how much he liked women who were “clean.” I nodded, but I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. I thought maybe he meant women with a “clean bill of health.” That’s good, I thought: he’s a responsible adult. He gave me the impression that that’s not what he meant at all. I ventured a few guesses: a woman who showers before doing the deed? Immediately after? Clean-shaven? A Brazilian bikini wax? Bizarrely, Kevin didn’t confirm or deny my guesses, and I could get no equivocal answer from him about what he meant. He just said, again, “clean.”
I wondered if I was clean? If he was going to take out a sponge? It seemed more like an insinuation than anything specific or, if it was, he didn’t say so. I didn’t know how I could make an educated decision about how to respond if I didn’t know what I was responding to? It was so strange.
We finished lunch, with me being perplexed as to why he was so insistent about not explaining himself on this topic.
As we were leaving, Kevin asked me if I wanted to go back to his place. I declined. We hugged at the door, and he said he would text me, but I never heard from him again. I didn’t mind — dating is hard enough without worrying about whether or not I’m a guy’s idea of “clean.”