I thought he was the one, until he took a number two

Deborah is a 34-year-old office manager who lives in Ajax. She says, “I’m petite and curvy, kind of a classic ‘girl next door’ type.” She is “funny, friendly, sarcastic, loving, dedicated and genuine” and loves “travelling, watching movies and football, photography, reading, cooking, theatre and exercising.” She says, “I’ve been single for just over a year. I go on one or two dates a week if I’m not seeing someone exclusively.” Deborah is looking for someone who is “fun and funny, adventurous, sexy, passionate and hopefully ready for a life together.”

I met Isaac online. He seemed really funny and cute. We had some things in common and really connected right away. There was a spark.

In person, Isaac was funny and cute, just like I thought, and also sweet and adorable in a genuine way. Our dates were great. There were no red flags. Once, he burped and immediately apologized for it. You could tell it just slipped out and he was embarrassed by it.

We had dated for almost two months when he asked me to come over for a “dinner and a movie” date. I knew there probably wouldn’t be a movie, but cuddling on the couch sounded good to me. It was also going to be the first time we had slept over together.

I drove to Isaac’s place after work one night. It was really romantic. He cooked and the food was delicious. We even drank red wine and ate dessert — he didn’t make that — on the rug on his living-room floor. I really enjoyed it and could feel myself falling for him even more. I loved the way he laughed and the way his eyes sparkled. I was confused, after dessert, when he stopped in the middle of a pretty heavy make-out session to suggest I put some more clothes on — I thought he’d want to take my clothes off. But he wanted to go for a walk.

We ended up going for a long walk, all around his neighbourhood. It was actually really fun. When we got home, we ended up making out again right inside the door and it didn’t take long for us to take our clothes off — finally! We did it on the living-room floor. Afterward, I thought to myself “OMG! This might be him . . . This could be him!”

We eventually made it to the bedroom and spooned and cuddled, wrapped up in the blankets. It felt like we had been together forever. It obviously hadn’t been that long, but I just had a good feeling about him.

The next morning, I woke up and we did it again. Morning sex is my favourite. I went to take a shower and get dressed. It was a weekday and I needed to get to work. As I was putting my makeup on, Isaac came into the bathroom. I had opened the door while I did my makeup because the bathroom had gotten steamy during my shower. He kissed me, which I really liked, even though I was late for work. His hair was messy and cute, and I thought to myself “I could wake up to him every day, without an issue.” It felt so intimate.

The next thing I knew, he was on the toilet taking a poop next to me, still talking to me as I put on my makeup! Did I mention that this was our first sleepover?! Clearly, I wasn’t the only one who had the feeling that we had been “together forever” — his bathroom behaviour took the relationship to a whole new level. It turns out there was an issue: a big, gross issue.

He didn’t say he needed to use the bathroom; I would have left if he did. I stood there for what felt like an eternity staring into the mirror, wondering if I was dreaming, because I didn’t want to make eye contact with him. Did he expect me to make small talk as he pooped?

I excused myself, closed the door behind me and packed up my things. I chickened out and didn’t say anything about it. I guess he just thought we were at that stage of the relationship. I wasn’t at that stage and I’m not sure I ever will be (or want to be). Some things should just be done in private.

I never saw him again after that. I had to go out of town for work pretty soon after the date, which he knew about, and we only texted a few times while I was gone. When I got back, I called him to break up with him. I told him how busy I was with work and said that we lived too far apart. We didn’t discuss the poop incident.

Deborah rates her date (out of 10): 2 Want to be a dating diarist? Email datingdiariescontact@gmail.com