PHOTOGRAPHS & MEMORIES
Family dinners. The Christmas salmon. Visits to Santa. Readers share holiday traditions and memories,
Family dinner with all the fixings, a visit to Santa, a solitary evening stroll in the snow — many of us have holiday traditions we look forward to all year long. The Star asked readers to share their most cherished traditions. We also asked some well-known Toronto residents and visitors to the city to tell us their favourite moments at this special time of the year. Our series kicks off today.
Abig squeeze
“Growing up, there were eight children in my family, and Christmas was always a cherished celebration. Our parents made it a happy and fun time and there was always lots of food, special candies and nuts. My mother would create Christmas dinner with all the works, including her steamed pudding. It was to die for. Later that evening, we would visit my grandparents’ house. My grandmother would make the most delicious homemade ice cream. She used the old-fashioned churn with ice and rock salt plus fresh cream. It was usually so cold she would set the whole contraption outside in the snow until it was time to eat.
“To this day, my siblings and I talk about the sweet vanilla flavour. Even though some of us have moved abroad, my sib- lings and I continue the tradition of a big family meal on Christmas Day. Two of my sisters have hosted the dinner and in 2011, when I returned to Toronto, the baton was passed to me. Not all the original siblings are able to come each year. But when they do, we make the table a bit longer to squeeze everybody in. It’s special because we have family discussions, pass on bits of history to the offspring, share recipes old and new and reminisce about our childhood. We think our parents would be pleased that we make the effort to get together. It is the family thing to do.”
Wilhelmina Cromwell-Heyliger, North York
Sleepover with a theme
“At our house, New Year’s Eve is an overnight, multi-family event. We have friends with kids both older and younger than our 8-year-old daughter, and depending on the year, there have been as few as 14 or as many as 30 people of all ages dressed up in their finest! There are multiple parties happening at once in different parts of the house . . . movies, ping pong, arts and crafts, kitchen conversation, and tons of both kid-appropriate and grown-up food and drink. We often have a theme for the meal, something tongue-in-cheek about the year that was or the year to come, and everyone participates in the cooking. Last year our theme was “Make America Taste Great Again,” and it involved some classic American foods as well as dishes from countries affected by Trump’s travel ban. Everyone of all ages stays up past midnight and we do a big countdown. Then we all have a huge sleepover with air mattresses on the floors and lots of little people giggling until late into the night. The next morning the groggy grown-ups make a big breakfast for the whole crew and people don’t go home until well into the day. It’s a tradition that offers just the right mix of family and friends, excitement and ease, and we all look forward to it every year.” Dr. Danielle Martin, family physician and vice-president of medical affairs and health system solutions at Women’s College Hospital and author of the 2017 book, Better Now: Six Big Ideas to Improve Health Care for All Canadians.
Afishy tradition
“For more than 60 years, our family has enjoyed salmon for lunch on Christmas Day. This tradition began when I was a child when my mother wanted to serve something different yet filling for lunch on this busy day. She would mix two cans of sockeye salmon with celery and onion and serve it on white bread. It was delicious. Over the years, we have altered the tradition slightly. We have enjoyed salmon mousse, smoked salmon, salmon dip and sometimes salmon and cream cheese on bagels. But always, we have salmon. Sadly, my mom and dad are no longer with us and my brother lives in Mexico. But my husband and I and our two daughters continue to love this tradition and begin planning for it far in advance of Dec. 25. This year, they are planning a trip to St. Lawrence Market to purchase fire-baked bagels to be topped with cream cheese and smoked salmon.” Lynn Detcher, Mississauga
Awalk on the chilly side
“I’ve always enjoyed taking a walk on Christmas Day, peering into windows, quietly observing other families around the table, or kids in the yard tinkering with new outdoor toys. Not sure if it’s the chocolates and pastries I usually binge on early in the morning or the emotional weight of the season, but I find that I crave the cold air to clear my head, to invigorate my body. I also like walking the streets when nearly everything is closed, minus a 7/11 or gas station.
“As I wander, I pay close attention to who else is out and about. As I pass strangers, I imagine where they are going. I like to unravel an imaginary story of what their day is about in my mind. A solo walk on Christmas Day, even for just 15 minutes, gives me peace, quiet and solitary reflection that I cherish. It’s extra special if there is fresh snow and I get to hear a crunch as I walk the streets and sip a coffee.” Jen McNeely, founder and editor-inchief of the women’s news and affairs site Shedoesthecity
Aspecial tree for late grandparents
“Growing up in Toronto, my brother and sister and I had the blessing of having our grandparents live with us in our home. Every Christmas morning, we’d go downstairs and gather around their small Christmas tree to open their gifts to us. It’s been nearly 20 years since their passing, yet we still think of them every Christmas. Seven years ago, my siblings and I, along with our mother, planted a small evergreen tree at their gravesite. Each year we decorate their Christmas tree to honour their memory and keep that childhood tradition alive in a small way.” Damian Campbell, Mississauga
YYZ to NYC
“I created this Christmas tradition because the first time I did it, I found it affirming and uplifting. It has felt that way ever since. Each Christmas, I go to New York. I love Christmas in that incredible city. Everyone that lives there becomes a family for just one day of the year; no one seems lonely even if they are alone on Christmas Day. I love being with my family and feeling like we are a part of that citywide community, one in which everyone comes together to prevent people from being isolated and alone. Just before or after Christmas Day I treat myself to a Broadway show; it’s a way for me to disconnect and immerse myself completely in the experience. Last year, I saw Hamilton, which was great!” Olivia Nuamah, executive director of Pride Toronto
Gift-opening go-getters
“We used to have a tradition where every Christmas Eve, my brother and I would be allowed to open one gift before bed. One year, it escalated and we ended up opening all our gifts on Christmas Eve. We were sad we had nothing to open on Christmas morning. And that sort of ended the tradition!” Darcy Oake, one of the stars of The Illusionists — Live From Broadway performing at the Princess of Wales Theatre from Dec. 12 to Jan. 7.
Atradition for generations
“Our family’s annual tradition began 33 years ago in 1984 when we lived in Mississauga. That December, our three boys were 6, 3 and 1 years old, and we decided to take the Go Train downtown to enjoy the department store window displays, see Eaton’s Lego exhibit and, of course, visit Santa at the Eaton Centre. It was a full day of excitement and we promised ourselves that we would do it all again the following year. We’ve kept that promise, returning every Christmas season. Now, our adult children, their partners and our grandchildren cannot wait for our special family day in downtown Toronto.
“These days, we start our day early by meeting for breakfast and we enjoy watching our three grandsons (ages11, 9 and 3) decide what they are going to tell Santa. From there, we all head to Hudson’s Bay to visit with Santa and have our traditional family photo taken (this year, we are adding a new tradition of everyone having to wear plaid). We then head to the main floor to see the Bay’s window displays. Next, we decide who will buddy up together, and the rest of the day is spent shopping with our buddies. Late in the afternoon we meet at a restaurant for a relaxing meal and have a wonderful time talking about our day. It’s a tradition that brings us closer as a family and a day where everyone feels young at heart. I know it’s a tradition that will continue year after year.” Pat Kelly, Burlington, Ont.
A tradition of poverty that doesn’t need to be
“My older brother and I were raised by a single mother. We were materially poor. This, of course, made life difficult and more stressful than it needed to be. It presented all kinds of challenges for us, but I think none more so than during the holidays. Each year, I was never sure if Santa was going to visit. Some years he did and some years he didn’t. What made it even more difficult was the fact that I was bombarded with commercials, TV shows and stories from friends about the wonderful gifts that they had received. One tradition that I’m reminded of is that I used to spend the holidays collecting the flyers that most people threw out. I searched for details on the latest and most popular toys so that I had something to say when everyone in class talked about the gifts they had received. It was always a time of great sadness and I’m sure frustration for my mother. While I may not be in poverty anymore, the unfortunate truth is that far too many families are. Far too many kids navigate the same challenges that I did. This simply shouldn’t be the case in a country as rich as Canada. I think about all of those families that struggle throughout the holidays to simply get by, and some will struggle without food. Why can’t this be the last year of poverty in Canada? The only gift that I want these days is for all families, especially the children, to enjoy the holiday season.” Paul M. Taylor, executive director, FoodShare Toronto