Can long-distance relationships work?

Re Four challenges of long-distance relationships, Jan. 16

The internet has connected us in ways and at speeds that are unprecedented. In seconds, you can talk to or even have a face-to-face conversation with anyone anywhere in the world.

However, despite this, we still feel alone and isolated. It is strange that even with our hundreds of Facebook friends, we fail to find someone to talk to. This tells me that the quality of communication over the internet is lacking. And if good communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship, can a relationship over the internet, devoid of physical contact, be satisfying?

Propinquity is integral to a relationship. Poor, or the total lack of physical contact, are indicators of the loss of passion in a relationship. Statements like “you never touch me anymore” or “you don’t touch me the way you used to” are clear signals of a relationship in decline. How then can a relationship that lacks physical contact work?

Absence makes the heart grow fonder but also remember that out-of-sight is out-of-mind. People make decisions based on the costs and benefits. Distance diminishes the cost of staying in a relationship and, as a result, the benefits from such a relationship will satisfy us less and less. A long-distance relationship can work, but rarely do they grow. Mukiibi Semakula Musisi Jesse, Toronto

Limerence is a state of mind that results from a romantic attraction to another person and typically includes obsessive thoughts and fantasies and a desire to form or maintain a relationship with the object of love and have one’s feelings reciprocated.

But in a long-distance relationship, apart from all the technical factors such as internet speed, lighting, audio and video quality, there is one big obstacle to the emotional expression: You can’t look at each other. If I stare at your eyes, I must be looking at the screen and you can’t look back at me. Eye contact is very important in emotional communication. So it is very hard to keep the relationship alive. Yuyun Zhang, Toronto