STATUS UPDATES

A week in which pizza stalking gets serious, tennis gets ugly and a sub commander needs to up his surface game

COMPLIMENTARY:

Pizzas sent to a German lawyer, albeit unwanted. Police are looking for whoever bombarded a Dortmund lawyer by sending scores of pizzas to his office, AP reports. They said the lawyer pressed charges but doesn’t know who’d want to do such a thing. A local newspaper quoted him as saying “it’s so irritating, I don’t even get my work done anymore.”

OUTSIDE JOB:

A major effort by a New Jersey city to get rid of crows. Trenton, which has an estimated 30,000 not-so-well-behaved crows, will benefit from pyrotechnics, lasers, spotlights, amplified recordings of crow distress calls and crow effigies, AP reports. The U.S. agriculture department is leading the effort to scare away the birds, whose droppings have proven unpopular.

TAINTED:

The image of American professional tennis. U.S. pro Donald Young (ranked 65th in the world) has accused compatriot Ryan Harrison of racism during a match at the New York Open, the Guardian reports. Words were spoken during a changeover that led Young, who is Black, to make his accusations. Harrison tweeted an “extremely disappointed” denial; the audio was unclear.

LASER-FOCUSED:

Mexico’s federal intelligence agency, on an opposition presidential candidate. The spies were kind enough to provide a plain clothes agent to tail Ricardo Anaya, AP reports. Anaya posted a video of himself confronting the agent. The interior secretary explained that tails are legal. “This isn’t spying, nor spying on opponents, nor are they clandestine measures.”

COSTLY:

A military parade in Washington, by some estimates. White House budget director Mick Mulvaney said such a procession, envisioned by U.S. President Donald Trump, could cost between $10 million and $30 million (U.S.). Mulvaney says the administration would have to seek an appropriation from Congress or redirect existing funds.

INSIDE JOB:

The disappearance of 36 million Nigerian naira (about $100,000 U.S.). A Nigerian sales clerk was suspended after she told investigators they had been consumed by a snake, the BBC reports. The claim by the clerk, Philomena Chieshe, was dismissed and she is facing discipline. But she’s already been facing national internet ridicule, at least until a reptile confesses.

TAUNTED:

Chapecoense, the Brazilian soccer team almost entirely wiped out in a plane crash in 2016. The Uruguayan team Nacional has been fined $80,000 (U.S.) and their fans banned for three games after some mocked the opposing players about the crash, BBC reports. “Unfortunately, many sick minds channel their irrationality to sporting scenarios,” Nacional said in a statement.

DISTRACTED:

A senior commander of Britain’s Royal Navy. Justin Codd pleaded guilty to causing a crash involving one of the country’s four £1-billion nuclear submarines. It happened in a training exercise off Spain in 2016, the Daily Telegraph reports. HMS Ambush suffered more than £2 million of damage when it hit a merchant vessel; now Codd has lost his seniority for a year.