I ignored his sloppy appearance
But then things went downhill when he only talked about himself
Georgia is a photographer in her mid-30s who lives in the east end. She says “I guess I’m stylish, but in a comfy way. You’ll probably find me in skinny jeans and a sweater.” Georgia is “Communicative, funny, and typically the organizer of events. Perhaps a bit crass at times.” She likes to exercise, play boardgames, watch TV and drink beer or wine. Georgia says “Online dating is exhausting, but I keep pressing on. I’d say I’ve been on approximately eight to 10 first dates this year. I’ve gone through a lot of frogs. I’m looking for someone smart, with a sense of humour, who has a job and doesn’t live with his parents — you’d be surprised.”
I met Davis on an app, as I was trying to get back on the horse after the end of a relationship. He was engaging and funny, and he really just went for it in his messages. Long paragraphs with meat. That was huge for me, because I love a guy who doesn’t play games, like waiting an hour to respond and then texting two lines. The conversation was great right off the bat, fluid and on-point. We were clicking.
A couple days after we started messaging, he asked me out for a drink that upcoming weekend. I loved how unafraid he was to suggest a date without weeks of going back and forth.
Normally, it takes a lot of mental energy for me to prepare for a date. You never know who or what is going to be behind door number one, two or 27! I was probably a bit stiffer than usual going into this date because of my recent breakup. But, I was inspired by how good our messages had been, and found myself actually excited for the date, and eager to meet Davis.
When we met, outside the bar, I realized I could be attracted to him. He was good-looking, and looked like his photos, which was a bonus. But, he didn’t put any effort into his attire — he was wearing baggy clothes and dirty shoes. This isn’t that unusual.
Davis had a big personality. He talked constantly and was overthe-top in a lot of ways. I assumed he was nervous, and found it kind of cute. He mostly came off as goofy and funny. I was looking to be distracted and entertained, and he delivered. Still, at times he was bordering on obnoxious, and I felt a bit embarrassed. I was wondering if maybe he was one of those people who likes getting a rise out of the people around him.
I’m a curious person who can go with the flow, so even on a bad date, I still run with it as a way to learn new things about the world. There are tons of different kinds of people out there, and I'm no expert at which one is best for me, so I test drive a lot and try to be open-minded. I can be a personality chameleon who caters to others and forgets about myself. Sometimes it’s good, and sometimes it’s my downfall.
Davis talked about himself a lot. I started getting annoyed at the fact that he wasn't asking me any questions about me. In fact, he didn’t ask me a single question about myself — not even the basics like where I grew up or went to school — but he did compliment my looks a lot. It should have been the other way around.
I think guys don’t ask enough questions because, a) people naturally like talking about themselves, and b) I think guys in general are less self-aware than women, and don’t pause for a second to bounce the conversation back, and c) some guys think the world just revolves around them.
I also think there is an epidemic in Toronto of guys who think they’re ready for a relationship, or say they are, but really aren’t.
He paid for our snacks and drinks, which I appreciated, since he drank a lot more than I did.
Outside the bar, we hugged goodnight. Davis was really enthusiastic, for some reason, and about seeing each other again. I thought to myself “You’re two minutes away from escaping this awful date. Be pleasant.” So I was. Then I left and didn’t look back.
Georgia rates her date (out of 10): 2
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