Long and short of it: He was charming, thoughtful
They talked and laughed, and Tayla left wondering if Keith was stand-up guy
Tayla is a 31-year-old arts administrator who lives in midtown.
She says her personal style is “jeans all day, every day.” She says “I love travelling and discovering hidden treasures. I take photographs of graffiti in streets and alleys everywhere I go. I’ve been all over the world.”
Tayla also likes “watching chick flicks, listening to live music, looking at art, camping, cottaging and really anything to do with the great outdoors.” Tayla says she is “confident, outgoing and interested in others.” She is looking for someone who has the same qualities.
Keith and I chatted a bit after meeting online, but quickly decided to scrap the back-andforth texting and just meet up. We decided to check out a dive bar on our first date. I was so excited to meet him. I loved his energy.
I got to the bar a bit late, and Keith was already there. He had found a table and was sitting down when I walked in. My first impression of Keith was that he’s better looking than I am. I hate to admit it, but it’s true.
We quickly bonded over moving to Toronto, the cities where we grew up and why we came here. His story was more unusual than mine. He has had a lot of adventures and I liked that he chose to come to Toronto instead of drifting into life here.
I was attracted to him, not just for the pretty face — although that was part of it — but more so for his experience, and his bravery exploring and stepping outside of his comfort zone. Keith was also creative and artistic. He had really devoted himself to his creative side projects. I was really impressed by that.
The conversation was great. The dynamic between us was really good. It helped that we are both outgoing and social. We both talked fast and laughed a lot.
Keith was “checked in” to what I was saying. We talked a lot about books and films. We liked a few of the same creators, and he recommended new books, films and music that he thought I’d like. That was when I knew he was interested.
The way he did it wasn’t condescending at all. It was more like he really heard what I was saying about what kind of stuff I already like, and thought carefully about what else I might enjoy that he knew about. It was thoughtful. The whole conversation was awesome.
We got up to leave, and as we both stood up, I suddenly realized that Keith was short. He wasn’t shorter than me. I’m five-two, and he seemed to be around five-five. I completely did not expect it.
I have to admit, I was slightly disappointed. Here he was: charming, artistic, smart — and short. I didn’t react. I didn’t want to be rude! Obviously it has nothing to do with the kind of person he is, I was just taken by surprise.
I hadn’t focused on Keith’s height before the date, but what he had listed as his height online was definitely not the reality. He was at least two inches shorter.
Even though I didn’t say or do anything, the vibe really changed. We didn’t talk about it, but things felt “cooler” as we walked out of the bar together, and the chemistry we had between us kind of fizzled away. Neither of us committed to a second date as we were leaving.
We didn’t end up going out again. We texted a lot, and followed each other on social media, and we even talked on the phone after that first date, but I lost the attraction to him.
A guy friend once told me that it’s sad that the world has all of these set social standards for us that turn into our personal preferences.
I agree with that. I think a preference about height, or any specific physical characteristic, comes from your childhood, the shows you watch, the people you grow up with.
That gets combined with how we don’t take enough time these days to get to know someone, and jump to conclusions about them. It might all be very superficial. But, I felt less feminine as we walked out together. I can’t help it.
Tayla rates her date (out of10): 8
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