Parody song is a hit with frustrated duffers

Chad Driscoll is likely the envy of many men.

Not only because the Peterborough, Ont., native possesses a euphonious singing voice, one so good he was a top-50 finalist on the first season of “Canadian Idol” in 2003. Or that he now has a four-day-old YouTube clip with almost 130,000 views, as of Thursday morning. Nope, it’s the way Driscoll spent his honeymoon in 2010 that will evoke the most jealously.

“My wife and I just travelled around and just golfed the whole time,” he said. “We went around Peterborough, Belleville, Trenton. Timber Ridge, we played that a few times, we really liked that course.”

Which must mean that his better half, Melissa, is an avid golfer too, right?

“Yeah, and I hate to say it, she’s better than me,” Driscoll said, with a laugh. “Keeps you on your toes. It’s not an easy win when you’re going at it.”

If you’re a golfer, especially a frustrated one in Ontario, you’ve probably seen or heard Driscoll’s ode to the game by now: “Ontario, Let Me Go (Play Some Golf ).” Sung to the tune of “Take Me Home, Country Roads,” it’s gone viral after Driscoll posted it to his YouTube channel and tagged the fellas on TSN 1050’s Overdrive, whom Driscoll listens to every day. Co-host and former Toronto Maple Leaf Jeff O’Neill shared the song with his 165,000 Twitter followers and the rest is history.

Almost 11, where’s the beer cart? I’m just kidding, I’m standing in my backyard

Chipping golf balls, over my kids’ toys

Wishing I was out there, playing a round with the boys

“All my friends, we all get together and golf, that’s what we do,” said Driscoll, who started singing in competitions as a child, taking after his bandplaying father. “Talking to them all the time, everyone is so frustrated about it, especially when the weather is nice, it really brings out the frustration in everybody. I just got thinking about it and thought, ‘I’m going to write a song.’ I didn’t know it was going to blow up like this.

“It shows you how many golfers there are in Ontario.”

The Canada Post worker — music is a side hustle — began writing an original tune but figured he should pivot to a song everybody knew since golf is a game for all ages. He messed around with a few, including Neil Young’s “Harvest Moon,” before settling on the John Denver ditty. He said the song took him only an hour to write, most of which was spent nailing the chorus. And even its final line — a perfect hook for a ballad about the hardest of games — was a last-minute change.

Ontario, let me go

Tee it up, and play some golf Feel optimistic, on hole one Drunk and defeated, when the round is done

“I forget what it was before but it wasn’t drunk and defeated. And then I just sang drunk and defeated,” Driscoll explained. “I was thinking about how you start the game. Every time you walk to the tee block, right, you are always like, ‘Today is the day, I’m going to have the best game of my life.’ And then by 18 you’re like, ‘I’m done.’ ”

Driscoll played golf as a kid, abandoned the sport for most of high school, and then picked it up again in his 20s. The 39year-old plays in the men’s league at Baxter Creek Golf Course outside his hometown and lives a block away from the Stanley Thompson-designed Kawartha Golf and Country Club, which is ranked by SCOREGolf as one of the top 100 golf courses in Canada.

“I could sneak on right now if I wanted to,” Driscoll joked.

Along with his music, Driscoll noted how much of a release golf has been for him during the pandemic, and like many in the province, he is perplexed by the government’s decision to shutter the sport, given the science behind its safety and its wildly successful season of 2020. He would be out playing twice a week if golf was permissible in the province, he said, pending his ability to secure a tee time.

“That’s the most frustrating thing, is that it’s only Ontario. If it was everywhere it would be different. It was awesome last year. During COVID, golf was your escape.”

Like all catchy tunes, there is only one problem with “Ontario, Let Me Go (Play Some Golf).” Watch Driscoll’s clip enough times and the song will get stuck in your head for the entire day or more.

“That’s John Denver’s fault,” Driscoll cracked, “not mine.”