Preparing your child for transition to a new school
Parents should have open communication with their children and not project any of their own concerns, experts advise
Though every child comes to the process with unique backgrounds, needs and concerns, when it comes to transitioning a child to private school, two of the region’s top educational consultants agree — preparation and clear communication are the keys to success.
“It is very important for parents and children to have open honest communication with each other and be able to talk about their fears and set realistic expectations together,” explained Karen Wolff, educational consultant with Wolff Educational Services.
“Parents mustn’t underestimate how difficult it is to start a new school and they must adopt as supportive an approach as possible.
“This is a major milestone in your child’s life, so make it a positive experience by celebrating it and naming it for your child. Explain that transitions may feel hard for some and not at all for others, but that change is growth and that is exciting. Barriers often occur when the child has not been consulted with the school choice or decision/the school is not the right fit for the child.”
Students and parents alike may have concerns about “fit,” but for Elaine Danson, education consultant at Elaine Danson and Associates, those concerns can be mitigated by doing the work and research upfront when evaluating schools. The vetting process itself helps with fit — and any academic challenges can be worked on in the right environment.
“Parents first must understand the educational profile of their child, the schools that support this profile, and the requirements to get into the school,” Danson said.
“If the school does not fit their child, then the child most likely will not gain admittance, and the process will be stressful for the child, parent and school. If the school is the right fit, then sometimes support through targeted tutoring can help if there are gaps in the students’ learning.
“Be prepared to attend events, or virtual events, to learn as much as possible about the school so that the student is familiar with the program and the environment.”
Additional academic support to get students up to speed can actually assist the socio-cultural transition as well.
“For instance, students may need to brush up on math skills if they haven’t reviewed certain topics,” Danson added. “Academic fit is the most important feature for transitioning because if students cannot perform well enough, they will be under stress and not feel comfortable in the environment. They may not have time to take part in the extra activities.”
Wolff explained parents taking a more comprehensive view of what defines success can also help to ensure their child finds the school that meets their needs, which should help to smooth any transition.
“One common mistake parents make is that they focus on one area of student success and achievement and they don’t consider the whole child as a marker for a true match when selecting a school, therefore making the transition into an environment that is not a total match a tougher ask,” Wolff said.
“In order to ensure a smooth transition, a school needs to meet all of the child’s social, emotional and academic needs and offer opportunities to utilize their strengths in these areas. A good match always means a smoother transition.”
If you’ve done the research and have had a child accepted, the best thing parents can do is to allow their children to have the experience themselves — and not project any of their own concerns on the student.
“Parents often show their stress as they project their worries for their child transitioning to a new school. Be matter of fact, supportive and positive. If you have done your homework and provided good support for your child, the transition will be successful,” Danson explained.
“I think that parents shouldn’t dwell on the transition too much. Get the information, present it positively and clearly a few days before school and move on. Children are more resilient than we often give them credit.”
It’s OK for parents to feel overwhelmed, but Wolff added that’s why there are professionals out there.
“Picking the right school and making the transition into that school a positive experience requires expertise into your child as a learner and their social and emotional areas of strength and need,” Wolff said, adding that educational consultants, psychologists, social workers and the school’s admissions team all can help.
“Do not hesitate at any point of this process to enlist the help of a professional if you feel like this is not your area of expertise.”