How to handle snoring partners
Many Atlantic Canadians said partner’s snoring ended up being because of sleep apnea
You crawl into bed exhausted but your mind is stressed knowing that you only have a few minutes to doze off before the noise begins. The source of the noise? Your beloved bedmate and spouse.
It’s safe to say that all love flies out the window when your significant other lets out rattling noises, unbeknownst to them of course, throughout the night.
From suggestions like “smack them on the head,” “keep a pillowcase filled with soap bars next to you,” and “sleep divorce,” to “it’s time for them to go to Jesus,” and “poke, prod, and push them till they stop,” Atlantic Canadians had surprisingly amusing responses when we asked them how they handle snoring bed partners.
Jokes aside, snoring can be a real health concern for the person doing the snorting and the person sleeping beside them desperately trying to get some zzzs before their alarm goes off.
REASONS WHY PEOPLE SNORE
Otolaryngologist, Dalhousie University lecturer, and owner of The Breath Factory in Halifax, Dr. Richard Balys shared that there are a number of reasons why people snore, some serious and some not.
“Our airway is a floppy breathing tube and we rely on the tone of our muscles to keep our airway open,” explained the head and neck surgeon.
“When we are awake, the muscle tone is high and our airway is open. When we sleep, our airway muscles relax and the airway narrows. If it becomes too narrow, the walls of the airway start to vibrate which creates the sound we would call snoring.”
How often and how loud someone snores will depend on the shape and size of their airway, the severity of the obstruction, and the parts of their airway that vibrate, said the physician.
“The vibration can involve the soft palate, uvula, side walls of the throat, and the base of the tongue.”
Alcohol, medications, allergies, sinus disease, being overweight, and being overtired are common causes that can aggravate snoring, according to the doctor. Some people have been snorers for most of their life because of bone structure specifics like a small jawline or a narrow hard palate. Sleep apnea is a concern here too.
There are also instances when someone starts snoring without an obvious reason. If the causes listed so far aren’t the culprits, your snoring could be related to certain medications, thyroid problems, rare diseases that cause swelling of the tongue, or protein deposits in the tongue, said Dr. Balys.
SLEEP APNEA AND SNORING
Sleep apnea is a potentially serious sleep disorder where your breathing stops and starts many times as you sleep. It is one of the few situations when snoring might warrant a visit with a doctor, said Dr. Balys.
“Obstructive sleep apnea is when your airway gets so narrow when sleeping that it blocks off partially or fully. If this occurs often, it can lead to various symptoms and raise the risk of serious health issues like heart attacks and strokes,” he said, adding that nighttime symptoms include waking up frequently at night (although most patients with severe sleep apnea often do not wake often), having to urinate often during the night, morning headaches, and bad quality of sleep.
“During the day, the main symptom is sleepiness which can lead to car accidents and workplace accidents. More common would be depression, anxiety, memory issues, the ‘brain fog’, and loss of sex drive,” said the physician.
Quite a few Atlantic Canadians said their partner’s snoring ended up being because of sleep apnea.
If you’re struggling to manage high blood pressure, diabetes, or acid reflux, you should consider getting tested and doing a sleep study, said Dr. Balys.
“Untreated sleep apnea can cause high blood pressure, diabetes, and worsening acid reflux, and puts you at risk for heart attacks, irregular heart rhythms, and stroke.”
Victoria Marshall from Aylesford, N.S., candidly shared that getting a continuous positive airway pressure or CPAP machine quite possibly saved her marriage.
“Living with someone who snores is traumatic,” she added. Her husband was such a persistent snorer that Marshall felt panic every time she went to bed. He was averse to getting a CPAP machine and turned to a dental device instead but that didn’t seem to stop him snoring “like a tornado”.
“The day that we were on our way home from Costco with our son in the truck, and he fell asleep at the wheel changed all of that. I grabbed the wheel and woke him, and no one was hurt, thankfully. We pulled off in Windsor and he grabbed a coffee. He didn’t speak until we were home. He unloaded the groceries and drove right out to buy a CPAP,” said Marshall.
Life is a lot better now – no earplugs and no lost sleep.
“I love him dearly but I was ready to park a mobile home on our property and move into it to get some sleep at night,” she said.
FROM THE MOUTH OF A SNORER
For Tanya MacLean of Cherry Valley, P.E.I., who’s been tested for sleep apnea twice, it turns out, it was something else entirely. MacLean shared that she suffers from allergies and is a mouth breather.
“We honestly sometimes can’t help it. We don’t mean to be disruptive but separate bedrooms are sometimes a necessity because being woken up every five seconds because of your snoring is just as disruptive. A good sleep is the end goal,” she added.
HOW TO COPE WITH SNORING (FOR THE SNORER)
Dr. Balys had some useful pointers for the snorers.
Get yourself checked
See a physician or contact a company that does sleep studies, said Dr. Balys.
“Home sleep studies are accurate to rule out severe sleep apnea which makes sure you’re not putting yourself at risk. Many of the sleep testing clinics offer sleep studies at no cost to patients concerned about sleep apnea.”
Sleep on your side
Sleeping on your back worsens snoring. Roll over on your side and get the help of side-sleeping devices if you need to, shared the physician. “Elevating the head of the bed can help some people.”
Build good sleep hygiene habits
“Try to pick a bedtime and wake time and stick to it.” Having a consistent and regular routine means you avoid late nights, insomnia, and exhausted nights.
Avoid alcohol, narcotics, and sleeping pills
“They may help you sleep quickly but the quality of your sleep goes down and the quantity of snoring goes up.”
Quit smoking
“(Smoking) causes fluid under the surface lining your airway and increases the volume of snoring.”
Prioritize exercise
Exercise is a good way to flex not just the muscles in your arms, legs, and core but also the ones in your airway, per Dr. Balys. “When you are breathing heavily during exercise, you are also exercising the muscles of your airway and improving the tone. The airway gets less floppy.”
Lose some weight
“If the problem is only snoring (not sleep apnea), losing about 10 per cent of your total body weight will make a large improvement.”
Take care of a congested nose
Look at the more simple causes like a stuffy or congested nose and speak with your doctor or pharmacist about nasal steroids to improve nasal breathing, said the physician. “The Breathe Right Nasal Strips, Nose Cones, or Nozovent device can be used to improve nasal breathing which helps some people.”
Invest in an ExciteOSA
ExciteOSA is a day-time sleep apnea treatment. “(It) stimulates the tongue muscle and increases the tone which reduces snoring at night. This device takes 20 minutes daily and is used at least three days per week but doesn’t require you to use anything at night.”
See a dentist
Sometimes, the problem can be fixed by seeing a dentist. “There are devices dentists can make that fit around your upper and lower teeth and move the jaw forward slightly. This improves the airway and helps snoring and mild sleep apnea. It can result in headaches, dental shifting, and jaw discomfort so should be done under the guidance of a trained dentist or orthodontist.”
For the snorer’s bed partners
White noise, headphones, ear plugs, and a sound generator.
Lally Michelle from O’Leary, P.E.I., shared that she sleeps with a sleep mask that has built-in earphones and plays white noise all night. “It drowns him out.”
Ear plugs were a popular recommendation by a lot of bed partners, but Dr. Balys shared that both headphones and earplugs, while good temporarily, are rarely longterm solutions.
“Using a sound generator in the bedroom helps the bed partner get used to some noise in the bedroom,” offered the physician.
Encourage your partner to get tested Sleep in separate rooms
A marriage won’t end just because you sleep in separate rooms. In fact, it might even save it.
Remember that you’re a team
“We all do better when we are part of a team. Healthy eating, avoiding alcohol, smoking cessation, and regular exercise are something that helps bring couples closer together,” shared the otolaryngologist.
Lucy Tsorbatzoglou had a similar sentiment to share. Reminding yourself that you love the person rattling away next to you can be good for your sanity.
“Getting annoyed by it will only wake you up more and not change the snoring.”