It’s important to talk to aging parents
As your parents get older, it’s sometimes uncomfortable to have discussions about sensitive topics like health care and finances. Most people in their 40s and 50s are beginning to think about having these conversations. Many are worried about their parents, especially if their health is failing and they live on their own.
Don’t jump to conclusions and don’t try to force a solution on a parent who isn’t ready. Refrain from being too aggressive until you have gathered all the information about your concerns. Observation should be your first course of action.
Don’t overreact if your parents need a little more help with household chores, meals or personal care. They may only require someone to come in and help out two or three times a week. It certainly doesn’t mean you need to start picking out a nursing home and putting their home up for sale. Working together to find a solution should be your goal.
Professional caregiving services can provide assistance in a number of areas such as meal preparation, light housekeeping or medication reminders. One should always try to find a solution that provides ongoing independence for your parents. so that they can live with dignity as they age.
When it comes to finances, some parents are very independent and private about the handling of their money. This is always a touchy topic, but should be discussed if you see a decline in their standard of living and are concerned. If you have a good relationship and trust one another, it’s a good idea to have joint bank accounts with your parents. If anything were to happen, and you couldn’t access their accounts, you wouldn’t be able to pay bills or look after finances on their behalf, without power of attorney.
Health and finance discussions with a parent are always better done sooner rather than later, when a crisis has occurred.
If they’re open to it, meet with their financial adviser and accountant. Make sure they have a will and POA, and talk to them about their final wishes. Together you can ensure everyone is cared for, respected and appreciated.