Drayton has lost its unofficial mayor
John Ford of Drayton; Born: Jan. 3, 1960, in Guelph; Died: March 26, 2024, health issues
Nearly four decades ago, John Ford was fired from his grocery store job in Drayton. Too slow, too chatty was the reason. But then something remarkable happened: public backlash.
John was reinstated and he’d remain in the job, bagging groceries and stacking shelves, until his death on March 26, 2024.
John was a unique individual. Chatty, yes, but he knew how to connect with people and his memory was extraordinary. Give him a date, a birthday, a wedding anniversary, and it would be locked in the vault of his mind forever.
Brother Rob Ford said this skill “saved the skin” of many a husband who had clearly forgotten his anniversary until encountering John and being reminded.
As an adult, John would be diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum. He was also a savant, possessing what is known as “an island of genius.”
This unusual ability to remember details about people endeared him to everyone. Upon his death, the family had to hold the memorial service in the Drayton arena, as hundreds of mourners came to show their admiration for a remarkable man.
“He was the epitome of social interaction,” said friend Glynis Belec. “He was such a jovial chap with a simplistic view of life. He chose to be happy.”
Being happy wasn’t always easy for John, given the grief he had suffered in life; the death of his closest sibling, his sister Sandra, his brother Kevin, then his parents, Jack and Joan Ford. He also experienced anxiety and depression. Despite it all, John created a place in the world.
Born in Guelph, one of seven children, on Jan. 3, 1960, John’s early life was sometimes shadowed by public comments about his intellectual disabilities. Brother Glen Ford said there were tears, but not defeat.
“He believed everybody was good,” added Bonnie Ford, noting that her brother had a naivety that helped him navigate through life regardless of what was thrown at him. Except when Sandra died of a brain aneurysm in 1982. John was 22, devastated by the loss, and his anxiety kicked into high gear. In his mind, everything, every problem was exaggerated. He took off for British Columbia without his family’s knowledge. He would eventually return after running out of money.
John loved his family and was unfailingly kind to his younger siblings, helpful to his parents.
“He was a good big brother,” said Glen Ford. “He took me everywhere with him.”
For the first years of his adult life, John struggled to find his place. He lived in group homes and on his own in Guelph and London, but nothing seemed to work out.
Over the years, disappearing would be his way of coping. Bonnie said they’d get a postcard from him, but he usually didn’t tell anyone he was leaving. She recalled when he was working at a bar in Guelph and disappeared without notifying anyone, including his boss.
“He left for three weeks and was upset they didn’t hold the job for him when he didn’t show up for work,” said Bonnie. To John, this was his life and he should be able to live it any way he chose.
The family had moved from Guelph to Drayton when John was 12. He attended Norwell District Secondary School, where he struggled through a two-year occupational program.
He held several jobs, including Grand River Pottery in Fergus, before being hired at Freshmart in Drayton, where he worked for 36 years. He was happy, living in his own apartment downtown where he kept everything in meticulous order. No one was allowed to touch anything.
An ardent letter writer, John connected with pen pals around the world. It started with a few he found in magazine advertisements and those friends often connected him with others, until there were more than 100. His letters, all written in longhand, would tell his pals about his town, his work, his life. His pen pals did the same.
Bonnie describes clearing out his apartment and finding cases of letters from people in Europe, Asia and Africa. John lived vicariously through these letters and the last one received was placed in his casket.
“There were so many people he reached out to,” she said. “That was his way of venturing out without actually venturing out.”
Raised a Catholic, John made friends with the Mennonite community and they in turn embraced him.
Rob talks about how the Mennonites gave their friend a deeply moving send-off, even singing by his gravesite. All of Drayton seemed to care about John.
“He had the support of the community to thrive as he did,” concluded Bonnie.
John died at the age of 64 after living with diabetes and high blood pressure.
With his death, Drayton has lost its unofficial mayor.