Making Heads and Tails of Dining Etiquette

Did you know there’s a very intricate set of rules when it comes to table manners in China? While in the West, it’s easier to distinguish status by who sits at the head of the table. But in China, where round tables are more common, it’s a bit more difficult to tell. (Quick note: if you’re dining in a private room, it’s the seat that’s facing the door.)

There’s another way to suss out the most important person at the table when the fish arrives. In China, instead of fillets, you’re served fish whole. Placement of the fish on the table and how it’s consumed involve detailed etiquette, especially during formal meals. According to Chinese culinary traditions, a fish dish is a table centerpiece that signifies abundance, prosperity and unity. So before digging in, you need to understand the cultural symbolism (and associated drinking culture) that comes with eating fish whole.

The fish is served after the first course of cold dishes, signifying the progression of the meal. When the fish is presented, its head is generally facing the guest of honor. This placement holds significance, as the head is regarded as the most flavorful part.

Then, the person serving the fish first offers a piece of the cheek, considered a delicacy, to the guest of honor. This represents sharing the best part of the fish as a sign of respect and good wishes. This person would usually follow up with a toast to the whole table. Only then are you allowed to start eating. A few things to remember as you eat: don’t dig around the fish for a particular piece. It’s considered rude. And, when half the fish is eaten, never flip it over to get to meat on the other side. Instead, remove the bones, or if all else fails, ask a waiter to do it.

So, that’s it right? Head faces the VIP, don’t make a mess and don’t flip the fish. Wrong! There’s a whole drinking culture that goes hand in hand with fish eating in China.

One common practice is that when a whole fish graces the dinner table, it’s time for an official ganbei (“bottoms up”) toast. The first one is done by the guest of honor to the whole table. Everybody drinks.

Then the fish sort of turns into a spinthe-bottle drinking game. But each region has its own rules. For example, in Central China’s Henan Province, the person facing the head drinks two shots, while whoever is facing the tail drinks three and those flanking the fins drink four.

Mastering the customs of enjoying a whole fish and navigating Chinese drinking culture not only ensures a harmonious experience but also shows respect for the rich cultural traditions that accompany each dish. This synergy of shared toasts and flavorful bites creates a dining experience that goes beyond the culinary, embodying the spirit of prosperity and camaraderie. Of course, in some parts of China, unless you can really handle your liquor, you might not remember anything past the fish course.