My Sports Report
My three- year wedding anniversary was coming up in a couple of days and I wanted to buy my wife a present to surprise her. During the day, though, I’m at work and after work my wife has an eye on what I do. So I have no time whatsoever to do anything else.
I thought of asking my boss for a day off. Yet considering all my annual leave had been used up, my only option was to feign illness. You know, a flu or cold couldn’t exactly come on overnight, and that excuse wouldn’t melt the boss. So I decided to pretend I’d sprained my ankle and couldn’t walk. This way I’d be able to get the day off without a hitch.
The next morning I gave my boss a call and told him that I’d accidently sprained my ankle on my way home from work last night. I told him that it was pretty bad, that I couldn’t even walk on it, so I wouldn’t be able to go into the office today and he consented. My plan worked, I got what I wanted. I went to some big malls trying to pick out a gift for my wife, spending the whole day hemming and hawing over. Though it was exhausting, I found something in the end and I guess my efforts were not in vain.
As soon as I went to work the next day, my boss called me into his office and said, “Wu, yesterday you said you sprained your ankle but you were faking it, weren’t you? If you wanted the day off, just ask, but lying is unacceptable.” I sat there absolutely ashamed, apologizing to my boss for what I did, but I just couldn’t figure out how he knew that I was pretending.
My Boss continued, “Never mind it. It’s just that your public WeChat sports profile showed you walked 25,000 steps yesterday. If you had sprained your ankle, there’d be no way you could have walked that much.”
, November 29, 2017. Translation: Sam Bowden)