The World of Chinese

YOU'VE GOT QUESTIONS? SHE'S GOT ANSWERS (BUT YOU PROBABLY WON'T LIKE THEM)

- 懂王懂后总统聪明无聊­人士烂问题传统的讨厌­怜消费主义单纯的哭泣­尾款人糊弄人与时俱进­订金失败自求多福自定­金

What do you think about the US elections? It’s all people talk about these days.

Political Pete

You’ve come to the right person: No one knows more about US politics than me. Just like the current US president, who is nicknamed (d6ngw1ng, “king of knowledge”) in China, I am the (d6ngh7u, “queen of knowledge”). Some people would say I’m very, very (c4ngm!ng, intelligen­t). Otherwise, why do you (w%li1o r9nsh#, bored people) keep asking me all these (l3nw-nt!, stupid questions)? I have a better idea: Why don’t they just find a good (z6ngt6ng, president) and hang on to him to save all that trouble? Forget about the Constituti­on; people have to learn to (y^sh!-j&j#n, advance with the times), and dare to make change, right? Yes you can!

Did you get anything from this year’s “Double 11” online shopping festival? I have so many packages coming!

As a

Shopaholic Susie

(chu1nt6ng de, traditiona­l) person, I absolutely (t2oy3n, hate) it! Another perfectly good holiday ruined by (xi`of-izh^y#, consumeris­m)! Double 11 should be a (d`nch%n de, innocent) made-up festival for single people to reflect on their (sh~b3i, failure) in finding a partner and drown themselves in

(z#li1n, self-pity). They should stay up late because they can’t stop (k$q#, crying), not because they want to snatch the best deals at midnight. Plus, so many of those sales are just (h&nong r9n, screwing people around). How am I supposed to know the difference between

(d#ngj~n, down payment) and (d#ngj~n, deposit)? All those discounts are more complicate­d than rocket science! For every (w0iku2nr9n, people who have balance due) who is fooled by these shenanigan­s, I say (z#qi% du4f%, you’re on your own)!

Got questions for our Agony Ayi? Send them to agonyayi@theworldof­chinese.com

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