Mother embarks on ‘Journey with My Son’ trek to aid charities
A 51-YEAR-OLD mother is planning a “crazy project” named “A Journey with My Son” in aid of the Lefkoşa municipal women’s shelter and the Help Those with Cancer Association (Tulips).
Helen Karayman, a “professional tourist guide” originally from Romania but who has lived in the TRNC since 1990, had to quit her job due to her son needing support with his education during the pandemic and a fear that “I missed all of his milestones as a working mother”.
Deniz Andrei, now six, will join his mum on a month-long sponsored camping and trekking project, the date of which is yet to be set, that Ms Karayman hopes will give them “a new purpose for the summer” while raising money for good causes.
She said that being stuck at home during Covid, doing the “cleaning, cooking, washing and teaching everyday was not easy”.
The pandemic has also been tough on young Deniz, Ms Karayman emphasised.
“I mean come on, he is six. He needs friends! It was hard for him too,” she said.
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The mother said that Deniz has “two inversed chromosomes” which makes Ms Karayman “definitely paranoid”.
“If the two [inversed] chromosomes were next to each other, then it would have been Down’s syndrome. But it is, like, not so serious now. He just can’t have his own biological children but he looks normal, he’s like every other kid.”
Focusing on the impact of hardships on her “mental condition”, Ms Karayman stressed the need to “find ways to cope” and “spend time with [Deniz]”.
Ms Karayman, who went back to work when Deniz was nine months old, said that the TRNC state fails to properly support mothers, with insufficient financial support and maternity leave of just 40 days before the birth and 40 days after, and breastfeeding breaks when back at work.
“That is not enough for child development and for the bond between the mother and the child,” she said.
“Who wants to leave a 40 day-old baby? Do you know how many nurseries take 40-day-old babies? You can count them on your fingers . . . Mothers don’t receive enough help here.
“I had months of sleepless nights. It was a nightmare. Nobody supports these mothers. No-one has supported me. The government does nothing about it.
“Children grow up with their grandparents — we didn’t have the grandparents. So I just chose to stay at home. Of course, I lost my job, we had to live on one salary, which is not easy.
“But then nine months later it was like, okay, we can’t do this anymore because with this amount [of money] it’s impossible.”
Her JustGiving Tulips fundraising page — which aims to raise £500 — says that one of her main messages is to raise awareness of mental health during and after the coronavirus lockdowns.
“This is a particular message to the abused women (physically, emotionally or mentally), women who are subjects of domestic violence and feel compelled to live with a man because they think they do not have another choice and can see no way out; women that do not have financial independence
A relief map showing the route of the trek. Left, Helen Karayman with her son Deniz, 6
in order to support themselves or raise their children; women who do not have enough time for their children because they have to work hard to make a living; and finally women like me, who had children late in life, and are not aware that the most treasured thing to leave to their children is memories of times spent together.”
Referring to the women’s shelter in Lefkoşa, Ms Karayman said: “The women that find refuge there with their children have absolutely nothing! They are in need of everything you can imagine.”
She added that people suffering from cancer need both economical and moral support.
“All these fundraising events not only get funds, but also show these people that someone out there is thinking of them.”
Ms Karayman said that her “A Journey with My Son” idea was inspired by a star-gazing trip to the Eco Camp Indigo in Girne in August last year where Deniz was free to socialise with people, run around and even “used a hammer to build material which he wouldn’t have learned at a school”.
So far donations have only been made in terms of camping materials, and the volunteers who will carry supplies to them during their month-long adventure
have not been found yet, although she has set up “emergency” aid plans.
Ms Karayman has also set up a blog to document her experiences and receive “community support”.
Today Ms Karayman and Deniz will be at the peak of the Five Finger Mountains for a “simulation” of their journey. Others can join for 50TL per person, which is for the services of “professional guide Engin Şah”. Of this amount, 10TL will be donated to Tulips and the women’s shelter.
Those wishing to join can contact her via her “A Journey With My Son” Facebook blog page.