WHO’D A THUNK IT?
LET’S see how he does in the biggest and toughest league in the world”, “Scoring for fun in Germany is all well and good let’s see how he handles Premier League defenders”. The two quotes sum up the thoughts of many fans and pundits when Pep Guardiola pulled the trigger on Erling Haaland. It’s probably fair to say following his third successive league hat-trick that not many people are having doubts about the Norwegian right now.
Erling Haaland fun fact
So far this season Citeh have played West Ham, Bournemouth, Newcastle, Palace, Forest, Villa, Sevilla, Dortmund, Wolves, United, and FC Copenhagen; he has scored against all bar one — Bournemouth. As someone once said “It’s a funny game Saint”.
A bit of extrapolation
At his current rate of scoring Erling Haaland is on pace for 67 league goals in 38 league games this season. Should he get this figure, then Dixie Dean’s longstanding record of 66 in 42 games would be finally consigned to the history books.
The main reason why he won’t beat the Evertonian’s record is of course injury, while the main reason he will beat Dixie is the fact that, unlike his peers, he won’t be going to the World Cup so will be fresh and firing on all cylinders when the league resumes at Christmas.
Nearly right
Prior to Arsenal playing Spurs last week I predicted the following: Harry Kane scores, a penalty, at least four goals, a red card, and at a minimum five yellow cards. So how did I do? Spot on, barring the yellow cards, of which there were just three issued. That referee has a lot to answer for, especially in not carding Odegaard when he pulled Sonny back when he was clean through.
Moronic Gooner comment of the week
“Kane’s penalty was rubbish, if the keeper had stood his ground he would have saved it. Kane isn’t even in the top 50 strikers in the world.” As if that wasn’t bad enough, the t*** goes on: “Son is so overrated, he hardly ever strikes the ball cleanly.” Obviously I imagined all those 20-25-yard scorchers with both left and right foot.
Anomaly of the week
In 11 of the past 12 seasons the first North London derby of the season has been played at the Islington library. Has to be mere coincidence, doesn’t it?
Numbers of the week
66-12-2-22-2-22-36-14-18-11: games overseen by Watford’s 10 managers since the Pozzi family took over in 2010. Makes Chelsea under Abramovich seem like a beacon of managerial stability minus the success at the Bridge under the Russian.
Megadumb chant of the week
Leicester vs Forest: “Champions of England you’ll never sing that.” Obviously Leicester fans weren’t paying attention to what was happening up the road at
Nottingham in the mid to late seventies.
Team of the week
Disclaimer: this just has to be my most lopsided selection ever but there were so many brilliant performances in midfield and up top I had no choice but to pick just two defenders.
Jordan Pickford Everton, William Saliba Arsenal, Granit Xhaka Arsenal, Bernardo Silva Citeh, Kevin De Bruyne Citeh, Ilkay Gundogan Citeh, Roberto Firmino Liverpool, Leandro Trossard Brighton, Erling Haaland Citeh, Phil Foden Citeh, Jack Grealish Citeh.
Manager: Pep Guardiola, how could it not be? Player of the week: Leandro Trossard. A hat-trick at Anfield give the man the trophy. It takes some doing to overshadow hat-tricks by Phil Foden and Erling Haaland but considering the venue and the opposition Trossard is the man.
This week’s games
Premier league today 5pm; Bournemouth vs Leicester, Chelsea vs Wolves, Citeh vs Southampton, Newcastle vs Brentford. 7:30; Brighton vs Spurs. Tomorrow 4pm; Palace vs Leeds, West Ham vs Fulham. 6:30; Arsenal vs Liverpool. 9pm; Everton vs United. Monday 10pm; Forest vs Villa. Friday 10pm; Brentford vs Brighton.
Selected Championship today 5pm; Blackpool vs
Watford, Millwall vs Middlesbrough, Norwich vs Preston, Swansea vs Sunderland, West Brom vs Luton. Tomorrow 2pm; Huddersfield vs Hull.
Selected Scotland today 2:30; St Johnstone vs Celtic. 5pm; Hibs vs Motherwell, Rangers vs St Mirren.
Champions League Tuesday 7;45; FC Copenhagen vs Citeh. 10pm; Celtic vs RB Leipzig, AC Milan vs Chelsea. Wednesday 10pm; Rangers vs Liverpool, Spurs vs Eintracht Frankfurt.
Europa League Thursday 7:45; Bodo/Glimt vs Arsenal. 10pm; United vs Omonia Nicosia. Europa Conference Thursday 7:45; Fiorentina vs Hearts. 10pm; West Ham vs Anderlecht.
Games to watch
Brighton vs Spurs and Arsenal vs Liverpool. Following Spurs’ abject performance at Arsenal, Antonio Conte bemoaned the quality of the final ball, which starved his strikers of opportunities to do their job. Well in Frankfurt on Tuesday there were oodles of great final ball played into the strikers but unfortunately they couldn’t hit the proverbial barn door. This inability to score will be problematic as they travel to the south coast to play a team who, comparatively speaking, are flying. The Seagulls have the ability to make this a very messy evening for the Lilywhites.
At the library tomorrow Bukayo Saka and Zinchenko will be rubbing their hands at the prospect of all the empty spaces Alexander-Arnold and his left-sided counterpart are sure to vacate. If Jürgen Klopp hasn’t sorted that problem area out then Arsenal will be another three points along in their futile pursuit of the title.
F1
Japanese Grand Prix tomorrow 8am. Having spurned the opportunity to get over the line last week in Singapore, Red Bull and Max Verstappen will be hoping to clinch the Dutchman’s first legitimate world title in Suzuka.
There are many permutations in which he will do so, but the main one is quite simple: a win and the fastest lap will do the job regardless of where his closest challengers finish.
And finally
Last week’s question: what connects Kansas City, Exeter, Johannesburg, and Leeds? The answer — Chiefs. Kansas City Chiefs of the NFL, rugby union’s Exeter Chiefs, Johannesburg football team the Kaizer Chiefs, and last but by no means least, Leeds band the Kaiser Chiefs.
This week: prior to Leandro Trossard’s treble last week, when was the last Premier League hat-trick by an away player seen at Anfield and who scored it?