Choices create conflict
Sir,
I have always wondered how do other people’s choices of how they go about living their lives affect the other person. Nowadays, there are people who believe that they have reached some sort of an apex point in the way they go about making choices. They think that having a choice on how you want to live your life fulfills an innate and universal desire for choice in all humans. This blanket thought has created a dilemma in humanity in that our every day choices are interpreted and perceived differently by those we live with, especially if your choice is against a known set of rules and norms.
Choosing how to live our lives the way we want has created conflict, hatred, sorrow, negativity and cracks in our interpersonal relationships. My choice to have emasi with sugar creates conflict. All over the world, the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer and Inetersex community is not wholly accepted and some even say they hate this group of people. Those who have chosen charismatic churches regard themselves as ‘better’ than those going to mainline/traditional churches.
Problem
The bigger problem here is that we no longer accept being told you can’t do this, but do that. Or you can’t do that but do this. This is because we have planted in our heads that each and every person must be at liberty to choose for oneself, always sticking to what you believe in regardless of what other people recommend. But do we always profit in taking such an approach in how we go about making choices? It’s a conundrum because being true to yourself somehow neglects human fallibility; that as human beings we are susceptible to err at any given moment. Being true to yourself doesn’t always guarantee that you are making the right choice. More so, sticking to your guns cannot always be a self-defining act.
The idea of choice should not create enmity, but it should open up an array of discussions of what choice can do and what it represents in every person’s life. So, no matter who you are and where you’re from, we need to respect each other’s ideas about choice, but still be at ease in discussing the compelling, complex and strangest nature of choice.
J Nhlangano