Dear Solitaire Reader,
Ihad the good fortune of dining with some friends on a weeknight not long ago and although I had hoped that it would be short and sweet – I have after all a day job and a long list of chores waiting for me the following day – I was happy that I stayed past midnight and past the final, final last round of drinks.
There was no shortage of the usual salmagundi of nourishing topics of conversation – local politics, AI, electric vehicles, the odds of seeing the end of Ukraine’s occupation, and creative meme-generation. For some reason all those disparate threads of conversation formed into a cyclone of opinions about personal choices in a way that alcohol-soaked postprandial conversations eventually do. And that was when the final, final last round of drinks were called.
I was happy to just listen to the stories about how the women among those gathered eagerly shared how they made deliberate choices that shaped their lives – from pursuing an unpopular degree at the university to leaving a promising and well-paying practice in order to self-start an enterprise. Choice became a moral choice and then a political choice.
Naturally, we covered the pros and cons of promoting STEM education among schoolgirls: pro because this is where future opportunities will lie and girls will continue to be at a disadvantage if they miss out, con because isn’t heavily promoting anything a form of choice deprivation?
I thought about personal choices on the ride home and how women are more inclined to pursue them today more than ever. Choice is after all what we vow to celebrate in Solitaire, more particularly owning the power to choose—not just pieces of jewellery or a career trajectory, but fundamental ones like faith in a supreme being or the healing power of, well, antacids.
Not long ago, jewellery was what one got from someone – a husband, say, or a person with the resources and reasons to give them. It usually came with a tacit agreement. Even when it was handed down from the women’s side of the family, it was like the passing of a responsibility.
But what I’m seeing right now are women friends who choose some big-ass pieces for themselves because they want to and they can. And that to me is great. I like that women – and men – who acquire jewellery are the ones assigning meaning to them, whether they are marking important transitions in their lives or remembering well-earned accomplishments. They are just more meaningful that way.