Kia Badass Drives
Some more adventure
It was a particularly slow day at the office, those rare calm moments when you can hear every second tick by. In contrast to last month and our first adventure with the Kia Seltos, this was absolutely unbearable! An encore was in order, only, Rahul was already once bitten twice shy of my “Why not skip office and head out” dialogue. I needed a new accomplice, someone less averse to my less than rational approach to adventure tourism. The thought barely crossed my mind, until Pratik almost magically appeared behind me. This was clearly a sign.
To spur things on, I turned on the video from our drive last month and pretended to be watching. Hook. Sure enough, a few seconds later, Pratik appeared over my shoulder. Line. “I wish I hadn’t missed out on this trip, it’s been a while since I had a proper adrenaline rush,” said the unwitting victim. Annnd sinker!
The keys for the Seltos were lying on Rahul’s desk and after our adventure last month, Rahul had been weary of my proximity to the keys, and rightly so. Little did he know, I had already worked outside a counter-strategy. While Rahul was busy animatedly discussing motorcycles over the phone, a quick gesture was enough to tell Pratik to seize the keys off Rahul’s desk. “Come back quick” Rahul gestured at Pratik as we dashed out of his sight. We’d be back quick alright, quick, for an adventure of a lifetime.
We loaded into the Seltos, threw it in
Sport, and made a hasty exit from the city. First stop, a campsite by the river just outside Rishikesh. Pratik, still oblivious to anything apart from the fact that we were headed for an adventure launched into a guessing game as I entered Rishikesh into the Kia’s onboard navigation. After 15 thousand tries, over the next 2 hours, Pratik finally decided that we were headed for an adventure in the water, rafting through the regions in-famous rapids. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he was only partly right.
Day-turned to a freezing evening as the Seltos darted through the narrow hill road leading up to Rishikesh. As of now, the only adventure was exploring the agility of the Kia. A combination of a sharp steering, and
well-damped suspension meant that no matter what the road surface was the Kia was able to stay glued to the line. The best part? A smooth ride and some soothing tunes playing over the Seltos’ surround sound bose speakers meant that a dozing Pratik stayed asleep until we pulled into our campsite. Sparing me a smorgasbord of random white water rafting facts that he’d googled on the way.
Absolutely famished and exhausted, we scarfed down a delicious dinner and quickly called it a night. The next morning, I awoke to find myself alone in the tent. Pratik who’d had a good sleep the night before had awoken and was exploring Rishikesh’s more soulful trappings. Legs crossed basking in the sunlight by the burbling stream, there was Pratik, meditating, peacefully. Unacceptable! So I shoved him, reminded him that he was here in search of adventure, advised him to load up on all the zen he could find and meet me at the Seltos in five minutes. The adventure was afoot!
Our first adventure involved heights. Something I knew Pratik was mortally afraid of. As you know the only way to overcome fear is looking fear dead in the eye. To that end, the agenda was to head to Jumpin’ Heights just outside Rishikesh and take a leap of faith from 272 feet above the river bed attached only by
IN CONTRAST
TO LAST MONTH AND
OUR FIRST ADVENTURE WITH THE KIA SELTOS, THIS
PEACEFUL EASY FEELING
WAS ABSOLUTELY UNBEARABLE! AN ENCORE WAS IN ORDER!
a bungee cord attached to our legs. One look at the platform and Pratik’s spirit of adventure vanished faster than last night’s dinner. A short pep talk and a modicum of cajoling later, Pratik legs tied to a bungee cord proceeded with trepidation towards the edge of the ramp. He looked down and almost changed his mind until the instructor told him he wouldn’t get a refund if he decided not to. Screaming expletives that we ought not put in print, Pratik plummeted towards the river bed, his momentum was quickly arrested as he reached the end of his tether and he shot back up, still yelling expletives in my general direction. I met him at the bottom, after jumping myself, and he was convinced that he was over his fear of heights. I hope so, I thought to myself, he’d need it.
After we climbed back up the hill to the parked Seltos, and Pratik had relieved himself of our morning’s breakfast from whence it went in. Pratik snatched the keys and the remainder of planning rights, and commandeered our adventure. Of course, Pratik’s predictability had gotten the better of him. While he drove us back down to the river, muttering to himself about my lack of self-preservation skills and the fact that he was hungry again, he didn’t know all was still going according to my master plan.
A LEAP OF FAITH FROM 272 FEET ABOVE THE RIVER BED ATTACHED ONLY BY A BUNGEE CORD ATTACHED TO OUR LEGS
We made our way down to the banks of the Ganga where our river-guide and raft were waiting for us. Unfortunately, the SUV that usually made the trip to the river bank with the raft was stuck in traffic, a few kilometres down the road. Our window to get in the river fast closing, we decided to risk it, load the raft up on the Kia’s roof rails and carry it down to the bank. Impressively, the Kia Seltos didn’t even flinch, living up to its Badass reputation. Soon we were piled into the raft, handed a paddle and launched down the river. The angry white peaks tossed us about for the next hour drenching us in freezing river water, struggling to stay locked into the raft we made it to nim beach. It had been a battle, between man and mother nature in all her glory, and both of us were glad to be back on terra firma. Pumped on adrenaline, shivering from the cold, we sipped chai and watched the sunset over the hills and talked about what a crazy day it had been. Of
course, my accomplice was under the impression that our adventure was over, as he (predictably) handed me the keys. Set the Seltos’ climate control to a toasty 24 degrees, sunk into the leather seats and passed out.
While Pratik snored away, I executed my the last act, a small detour past Delhi to a place called Narnaul in Haryana. As light broke, and Pratik arose from his almost legendary slumber, an airstrip had come into view, a few Cesnas lined up by the side of it. Expecting to find himself back in the office, Pratik’s absolute discombobulation amused me, as he pieced together the scene in-front of him. Once he had worked it out, a few more expletives were hurled in my direction. Narnaul is home to Sky-High adventures, India’s only Sky-diving location. At this point, Pratik made it known that he’d had it with my attempts to resolve his fear of heights and suggested that” I go jump out of whatever I liked and left him and his phobias alone” and found himself a spot by the runaway to -- and I quote -- “watch me go sploot”. Loaded into the back of a Cessna, we made our way 12,000ft off the ground. As we reached the jump, I was told to stick my legs out of the craft, and prepare to jump. 15,000ft above the ground, I almost wished I hadn’t so bravely agreed to go ahead and jump alone. Luckily, halfway through that thought, the instructor shoved me off, and we were airborne. Accelerating from 0-200kmph in the first two seconds of leaving the craft, and then a 26-second freefall towards the ground before the instructor deployed our shoot. This was the piece-de-resistance of our little adventure.
As we finally drove back to the office, we check in on the hundreds of missed calls from a confused Rahul. Of course our little indiscretion would have consequences, but they’d be borne with a smile on our face. Our partner in crime, the Seltos had been exactly as advertised, a vehicle as badass as the plans you make with it!